TITLE          LIKE A SPARROW IN THE TALONS OF AN EAGLE FANDOM          Stargate Atlantis PAIRING          Rodney McKay/John Sheppard (and many thanks to the mods for including this paring in the          challenge!) RATING          NC-17 WARNINGS          Spoilers for Seasons 3 and 4 but AU from early Season 4 SUMMARY          Another mission-gone-bad is the last straw for a tired and stressed John Sheppard. He takes          it out on the wrong person; Rodney steps in to make it better. WORD COUNT          24,764 Words AUTHOR'S NOTES          Tormack – a root vegetable, cross between parsnip, turnip and potato, thanks to          The_Cephalopod in "Catalyst"          Thanks to Fenchurch1 for her wonderful beta help. As usual, I have tinkered so any remaining          mistakes are mine.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

The debriefing after PS3-475 was the final straw for John Sheppard. The trip itself had started out pretty normally. Normal for Pegasus, anyway.

"Tell me again why we're walking five miles – in the sun – from the Stargate to this village?" Rodney whined without taking his eyes off the personally modified Life Sign Detector in his hand. "We couldn't take a Jumper even part way? I didn't bring enough sun screen for this!" He absently tugged on the floppy hat on his head, covering one part of the back of his neck while uncovering another.

John sighed to himself. He hadn't slept well the night before – and for too many nights before that a quickly suppressed thought skittered through his head – he had a headache, it really was warm walking in the sun and he wasn't in the mood for Rodney's complaints.

"I mean, it's a simple trip, nothing blocking the gate and we can see where we're going," Rodney continued in a well-worn thread that they had been through in the briefing. Several times.

"McKay," he growled as Rodney took a breath to continue. "Enough."

Rodney looked up at him with hurt in his eyes that John tried not to feel guilty about.

"I...." Rodney stuttered, breaking his stride slightly before starting up again. "Sorry," he said softly enough that John barely heard it. He looked down at the LSD and poked at it half-heartedly, making John feel even guiltier for snapping at Rodney.

"We are almost there," Teyla announced, almost unnecessarily since they could see their destination over the open plain, from her position in front of them. Ronon was bringing up the rear on the wide-open road from the Stargate to the settlement. Teyla had had enough sense to wear a wide-brimmed hat to protect herself from the sun.

Even though it was about five miles to the settlement, the position of the Stargate on a wide open plain and the settlement against the escarpment at the edge of that plain, meant that they needed to assume there were constant eyes on the Stargate. They had discussed that as part of the mission planning and Teyla recommended that they go in on foot to allow the Lanzanians time to evaluate the team. She only had second hand information about the people of this world but a quick look a few days ago with the aptly nicknamedMALP-on-a-stick they had developed – Rodney detested the name so it stuck, of course – showed the wide-open vista. The cultivated fields they could see in the distance put this world on the list to be visited sooner than later since new food and new trading partners were always high on the priority list.

A small group walked out from the city to meet them on the road about half a mile outside the city.

"Welcome!" The tall, thin man in dark clothing took a step in front of the group and greeted them with a short bow. His fair skin was a sharp contrast to the dark clothing. He was dressed in flowing robes that would not be out of place in the Middle East on Earth but on his head he wore a wide-brimmed straw-type hat that would protect his head and neck from the sun. The dark colors of the robes were offset by bright embroidery around the edges. The other three men were dressed similarly, the embroidery was different which may or may not mean anything. Plenty of places to hide weapons under the robes, John noted to himself, resting his hands carefully on his P90.

The men looked expectantly at John and Rodney and seemed slightly startled when Teyla addressed them.

"Greetings," Teyla replied solemnly. "I am Teyla Emmagen of the Athosians. Nabb of the Kendra sends his regards."

"Nabb is well known to us," the leader replied gravely, recovering fast enough that John thought maybe he was imagining things. "I am Cama Lize, leader of the city. This is Sany Morvay, Uhrl Ornin and Newa Denat." The others nodded as each was introduced. "We are the Council and meet with travelers." The other three men were just as fair-skinned as Lize, John noted.

"I am pleased to meet you," Teyla replied. "This is Colonel John Sheppard, Doctor Rodney McKay and Ronon Dex. We are travelers looking to arrange trade agreement between our peoples."

Lize considered them for a moment and said, "We will talk. Come with us."

John let Teyla's polite chatter with the Lanzanians wash over him as he looked closer at the city they were entering. It actually looked bigger from a distance – there was a block of taller buildings tight against the cliff and a couple narrow blocks of lower one and two-story buildings in the flat space in front of that. It was long and skinny and built only a short distance into the plain.

"In the hot season, the sun is extremely fierce and it is not safe to be in the open for too long," Denat explained to John, "the cliff provides shade for the warmest part of the day. Since we are now past the hot season, we can plant crops and it is safer to travel."

Out of the corner of his eye John could see Rodney pointing the scanner up toward the sun.

"Interesting," Rodney commented, "the planet is moving toward what we would consider winter but the orbit is that much closer to the sun than Earth's so my guess is that most of the planet is tropical or sub-tropical."

Denat's eyes widened a fraction. "There are stories handed down from our Old Ones of a time when the hot season was welcome and not to be feared."

Rodney tapped his device, frowning slightly. "Maybe an unstable orbit or other planetary influence that would change seasonal patterns like that. Can't tell with what I have here."

John caught a glimpse of avarice in Denat's face before Denat offered smoothly, "We can discuss allowing you to have access to the Hall of Records to examine the information that is there."

John smothered a laugh as Rodney's head came up, it was too easy. "Hall of Records?" John was grateful to see Rodney rein in his eagerness and look at John. "Yes, I would be interested if we could arrange that."

John put a hand on Rodney's shoulder and gave a small squeeze to indicate his approval. "I'll see if Teyla can add it to the agenda." Rodney nodded at him.

As they entered the city proper, John noted that the main road continued on the outside of the city, across the plain, while minor roads went into the city. Sort of a business by-pass he realized. It also made sense not to waste land that was protected from the heat of the sun on roads. As the road turned to skirt the city, Lize led them on one of the first offshoots toward a large building against the cliff.

"Our government building," Lize pointed.

Because they could use the cliff for structural support, the building rose – John counted – ten stories up. The outside had a brick-like facing with only a small handful of openings for windows.

Entering the building through a wide arch and a set of double doors felt like coming into air-conditioning. John looked around and saw more of the same brick that had been on the outside of the building.

"We use air from the caverns in the cliff to help cool the temperature of the outside," Lize explained at Rodney's sigh of relief. The walk had been warm and even John had to privately admit he appreciated the cooler temperature.

Lize turned to a woman wearing lighter colored clothing with less elaborate embroidery who had been waiting inside the door. "Bring refreshments to the meeting room," he ordered.

She looked back blandly, bowed, acknowledging the order, and hurried away through a nondescript door that blended into the wall. John wasn't sure of the look she gave as she responded to the order. He'd have to talk to Ronon later, when they were alone. A servant's entrance, John noted to himself, seeing a few more such doors in other walls now that he knew to look for them.

Lize ushered them into a chamber that would pass as a board room on Earth. A long wooden table dominated the room and chairs with cushions covered with embroidered cloth were set about the table. "Please, make yourself comfortable," he offered. Openings near the ceiling brought light into the room; there were brackets to hold other forms of lighting but the light was pleasant and much less bright than the sunshine they had left.

They ended up sitting around one end of the long table. Lize and the Council on one side, Teyla, John and Rodney on the other. Ronon leaned against the wall behind the team.

As they settled in, John thought it interesting that the Lanzanians barely looked at their weapons and made no mention of them. He couldn't decide if it was because they didn't know what the weapons were or had enough protection somehow that they didn't care. Another thing he'd have to ask Ronon about it when he had a chance.

The woman from the hall, along with two others, carried trays into the room. They set up food and drink in the middle of the table, near where they were seated. John noted they were pretty much dressed alike, the lighter colored clothing must be something of a uniform. The three women also had darker skin than the members of the Council, something that was not a surprise with the amount of sunlight these people live in. John watched the lead woman but she did not raise her eyes from her work.

One of the other women poured drinks and set a glass tumbler filled with a dark ruby colored liquid next to each of them. Lize raised a glass and offered, "To new friends."

Teyla lifted her glass and replied solemnly, "To new friends."

Lize frowned slightly but he and the other Council members then took a sip of the drink, as a reply to her toast.

John held his glass up before he took a sip of the drink and rolled the liquid over his tongue to taste it. He shrugged and suggested to Rodney, "Sorry, not sure, I think you need to pass."

"Okay," Rodney replied, setting his glass down without drinking. "Thanks."

Denat looked at them questioningly. John elaborated, "Doctor McKay has an allergy to some types of fruit, which tastes like part of this drink you have offered to us."

"It is not meant as an offense," Teyla added calmly. "It is a matter of protecting Doctor McKay's health."

"Allergy?" Ornin peered at Rodney.

"Doctor McKay is allergic to citrus," Teyla elaborated. "Are you familiar with gwynat fruit?" The Lanzanians nodded familiarity. "Fruit of that type will cause Doctor McKay to fall very ill. Or you may know of someone who falls seriously ill from the sting of the trawie bug. That is an allergy."

"I had a distant relation die after being bitten by a trawie," Ornin replied solemnly.

"Finally!" Rodney crowed happily. "Someone who understands!"

John saw Teyla give Rodney a tolerant look before she turned back to the Council. "We do have some treatment for such allergies that we might talk about trading. Naab suggested we ask about some of the fruits and vegetables you are known for."

Start of the actual trade discussion allowed John to tune out the discussion and look around the meeting room. He watched one of the women who has brought the refreshments before move around the edge of the room, checking to see if the trays needed refilling. The members of the Council ignored her completely but John knew Ronon was watching closely.

John took the opportunity to look over the Lanzanians across the table from them. While he couldn't be sure, there was no obvious evidence of weapons under the robes. Didn't mean there couldn't be knives or something more flexible strapped to their bodies. The uniform that the serving women wore was slightly less concealing and, in John's experience, servants were less likely to have weapons.

The room itself was fairly boring and it wasn't too long before John had nothing to look at and found his eyelids growing heavy. He had to fight to stay awake... the sleepless nights and the healthy walk, along with being forced to sit still in a semi-lit room contributed to the sleepiness. He knew if he had the opportunity to lie down, he might fall asleep for an hour or so but that wasn't going to happen here. He took another drink from the glass, hoping the small movement and the liquid would help to keep him alert.

John perked up when he heard Lize offer, "It is near the hour for the mid-day meal. We would appreciate it if you would join us."

Teyla glanced sideways at John and he gave a short nod of approval.

"We would be honored," she said smoothly.

"Come, then." Lize and the others stood and John was glad for an opportunity to move around as well as keep an eye out for weapons. Sometimes Ronon had the better idea, standing ready to watch but John knew as the team leader he should pay more attention to the discussion Teyla was having with the Lanzanians.

They did not go outside but up a flight of stairs to the second story and then down a hall to a connector between the government building and the building next door. It was inside the cliff face, which is why they had not seen it from the outside. John wondered how deep into the cliffs the Lanzanians had excavated.

They entered a large, airy room in the next building that was obviously related to a cafeteria. This room was brighter due to a series of windows along the one side. A series of small and large tables dotted the room and the smell of food wafted in the air. Lize led them to an alcove in the back of the room and invited, "Please, be seated. Food will be brought."

Ronon managed to seat himself on the far end of the table with his back to the wall. With a bit of polite jostling, the rest of the team ended up sitting among the Lanzanians and John ended up with his back to the room. It made the spot between his shoulder blades itch slightly and he had to trust Ronon to keep an eye out. The slightly polished wall in front of him would let him know if someone was coming but he'd have to turn around to see if it was just a server or anything more serious.

Food came quickly, Rodney waiting for John and Teyla to taste several of the dishes before he could start eating. A couple of things were suspect but Rodney ended up with a plate of a leafy salad, meatballs and the closest they had come to macaroni-and-cheese anywhere that John figured he should be happy enough with.

"I understand you are interested in seeing our Hall of Records?" Lize said to Rodney.

"I would be, if it could be arranged," Rodney replied eagerly. "We look for information... knowledge... wherever we can and anything you can add to what we have collected, I will be interested in."

John was pleased to see how Rodney had changed over time. He had learned to be more diplomatic when working with Pegasus natives about access to their records and technology. They had gotten into trouble too many times when Rodney didn't remember to ask, much less politely, and John was always happy to see that the lesson finally stuck.

"Uhrl can take you after lunch, if you would like," Lize offered. "It is on an upper floor in the same building where we met this morning. You do not have to be far from your companions."

John looked up at that. "I'd like to accompany Dr. McKay, if it's not a problem," John tried for casual but wasn't sure he succeeded when Lize looked at him sharply.

"Not at all," Lize replied. "I am just surprised that a someone like yourself would be interested in such things."

John shrugged. "Always interested in learning new things," he answered with a slightly forced cheerfulness.

"As you wish," Lize gave in with obvious reluctance.

With his back to the room, John only got glimpses of other diners and the servers. No one approached their group without a specific purpose and no one sat at any of the other tables near theirs.

"If you would like to wash up," Uhrl Ornin offered as the group stood from the table, "there are facilities close by."

"Yes, please," John answered. He had the drink from before and now with a healthy lunch – or maybe it was dinner, locally – he could use a bathroom.

There were separate facilities for men and women and the men's was one medium sized open room. No stalls or partitions, just the Pegasus equivalent of toilets – wooden stools with holes that dropped waste to a black hole below – along one wall. John could hear running water that he assumed took waste away right away since there was no smell of urine in the room. Ornin took one stool and sat, draping his long robes over himself, essentially providing his own 'privacy' as he went about his business.

John looked and nodded to Rodney to go first so they both wouldn't be caught with their pants about their ankles at the same time. Rodney moved off to one end of the row and peed into the toilet, not wasting much time. As Rodney washed up, John took a quick piss. He joined Rodney at the fountain that took the place of sinks. Cold water, John noted.

"Indoor plumbing is always a good sign," Rodney said to John.

"Sign of what?" Ornin asked.

"Civilization," Rodney replied. "We have been many places where such facilities are unknown. The local population isn't often large enough to have the need or understand that it's important to make sure that human waste is treated properly."

"Ah!" Ornin beamed. "Good to know!"

John thought of all the cold nights they had camped in the wilderness on various planets and pissing there meant letting your dick hang out in the cold. Having to take a dump was even worse. Any indoor amenities at all were appreciated.

Ronon took a turn as they left the room, having waited outside the women's facility for Teyla. Being the only woman in the group sometimes had its disadvantages and John remembered the almost-hidden doors in the Council chamber. The men's facility had no such doors but there was no way to know what was in the women's facility. Teyla could protect herself but John always felt more comfortable when they were at least in pairs and could back each other up.

Ornin offered, "I can take you to the Hall of Records while your companions return to the Council Chamber."

Rodney looked to John before answering, "We would like that. Thank you."

John nodded at Ronon. He knew Ronon would call on the radios if they needed anything.

As Teyla and Ronon followed Lize back to their discussion, he and Rodney followed Ornin up the stairwell. The Hall of Records evidently was near the top of the building but John was glad to see that Rodney wasn't really puffing as they climbed the stairs. John kept his mind on watching where they were going and not eying Rodney as he followed the other two up the stairwell to the eighth floor and then into a semi-dark entryway.

"We keep the light dim in the Hall to keep artifacts from deteriorating," Ornin explained as he opened what looked like an unlocked door. "Over time we have lost much information because it had not been stored properly and the sunlight hastens the damage."

"We have discovered that, also," Rodney agreed, looking around the chamber.

John could see a passageway that looked like it went deeper into the cliff side since it trailed off into darkness. The room they were in went up another story and was lined with shelves. A rickety looking ladder leaned against one wall which John assumed was used to reach the materials on the higher shelves. Some shelves held what John would call 'relics' – pottery, objects of varying types – while most held books. Well, 'book' was a kind term, it was more like oversized journals... it had a faintly Medieval look. He wanted to ask where the scribes were.

The room was lit by a series of openings similar to those in the Council Chamber. Filtered light came inside the room through the openings, dimmer than what had come into the Chamber below them.

Rodney turned in place, using his LSD to check for energy signals or anything else that might be useful to them. He looked up from the screen and asked with some dismay, "Everything is on... paper?"

"Yes," Ornin replied, looking proud. "We have the entire history of Lanzania written down and stored here. We keep the census of the city and all records in this one location."

"No power sources that I can see, Rodney," John pointed out. Brackets similar to those in the Council chamber studded the walls at a regular basis.

Rodney looked around carefully, looking between his LSD and the chamber. "After dark? How does anyone work here at night?" he asked.

Ornin replied easily, "We generally do not work here after dark. The lamps required are dangerous to the materials, the papers will burn if there are flames."

Rodney looked stunned for a moment then gestured toward the openings. "What is lighting the room, then?" he demanded.

"Sunlight," Ornin replied. "There are a series of... shiny surfaces that direct the sunlight from the outside into the buildings along the cliff."

"Mirrors?" Rodney was faintly aghast.

Ornin shrugged. "That is not a term I know. Shields?" he offered an alternative.

Rodney focused on his LSD, giving an occasional "hmm" that John couldn't quite interpret. He looked up at Ornin, "What about using the heat from the sun? Solar power? Do you have that?"

Ornin shook his head. "No, we mostly protect against the heat of the sun although it is used to heat water for bathing," he replied. "There are special cisterns that collect water that are along the top of the cliff that we allow the sun to heat. The water is piped into the bathing rooms."

"Community bathing makes sense in a place where I suspect water is limited and semi-precious," John put in.

"We have plenty of water, both in the cliff and under the plain," Ornin surprised John with that information. "But it is far below ground and heating it takes much fuel."

"That makes sense," Rodney put in. "Underground water is much colder than surface water and if we could do a surface scan of the entire planet, I suspect that there wouldn't be a lot of open bodies of water. The heat of the sun would evaporate most of that, especially if they are now going into a cooler season. The major portion of the planet must be pretty tropical and only the underground water sources keep plants and people alive."

"Show me how you get light into these rooms?" Rodney asked Ornin.

"Certainly," Ornin shrugged. He led them to yet another semi-invisible door that opened into a tiny space. "There is only room for one person but if you come here you can see the shields."

Rodney eased into the space and seemed to lean toward a wall John couldn't see from where he stood.

"Huh," Rodney said, twisting his body to look up. He backed out of the room. "Shield implied something manufactured, this is more basic than that. There are thin layers of what I would call mica on a wooden frame that directs the light into the building. With the light in the shaft, I can't really see the top or bottom but I assume it runs the entire height of the building."

"The children are used to keep the shields clean," Ornin explained. "Only the small, light ones can fit into the frames to clean dust off the shields. It is not usually dangerous but if a cleaner slips, it can be."

John grimaced. He understood the need to keep the 'shields' clean to keep the level of light at maximum levels but child labor always made him uncomfortable. And from the look on Rodney's face, it was a lot more dangerous than Ornin was admitting.

"Do you have any other types of lighting for this room?" Rodney asked.

"No," Ornin shook his head. "There is no need since it is only rarely that the sun does not shine."

Rodney shook his head in frustration. "I'm surprised no one has come up with some form of solar power if the sun shines as regularly as that."

"There are records of scholars who have tried to make other use of the sunlight but there has been little success," Ornin admitted. "All of the records talk about the difficulty in storing energy that is captured and in moving it from one location to another."

"Hmm..." Rodney poked at the LSD some more. "Little in the way of heavy metals in the immediate area." He looked up at John. "No batteries, essentially." He tapped some more. "And probably no copper, so no one knows anything about electricity. Even if they could capture energy, there's no way to get it out to be useful."

Ornin looked eager at that information. "Perhaps you could tell us more about these... batteries... To be able to store energy from the sun and use it would be a great benefit to our people."

"We can add that to the trade discussion," John suggested. "That is why we are here."

Ornin nodded in excitement. "Let us go back and talk to the others," he suggested.

Rodney looked wistfully around the chamber but John knew there wouldn't be much here for them to find that was new.

"Rodney?" John asked. "Ready?"

"Sure," he shrugged.

They made their way back down to the Council Chamber. John could see an unexpected level of tenseness in Teyla that was surprising. "How about a short break?" John floated into the room. "We have some new options that we need to discuss."

Lize nodded gravely but seemed relieved to see John and Rodney come back to the negotiations. Ronon nodded toward the rear of the Council Chamber and they stood together in a small circle.

"What's wrong?" John asked softly.

"Councilor Lize does not seem to want to negotiate with me," Teyla replied, puzzled. "We have gotten nothing done since you have left and he has hinted more than once that he would prefer that one or both of you be here. I assured him that I was authorized to speak on behalf of all but he seems reluctant to believe me."

John looked questioningly at Ronon who just shrugged. "They don't want to talk to either of us," he admitted.

"Let me think about this," John answered. "Rodney, give Teyla something about your solar power ideas to add to the negotiations."

John let Rodney babble at Teyla about what they had found. As he listened with one ear, he watched as yet another servant – the same one from the morning he thought – went about and refreshed the drinks and put out some fresh fruit.

"Ronon?" John asked as an idea coalesced in the back of his head. "Have you seen any light skinned servants? The only servants I've seen have been darker skinned."

Ronon tilted his head in thought. "No. All the workers in the food area were dark skinned while the majority of those eating were like Lize and the Council."

John snorted softly. "Old fashioned bigotry, then," he surmised. He turned to Rodney and Teyla who were looking at him questioningly. "Lize and his buddies are fair skinned," he elaborated. "Closer to Rodney and me. You two are darker skinned, therefore you fit their image of servants."

Rodney scoffed, "You have got to be kidding me!?"

Teyla looked closely and nodded slowly. "Lize and the others here are of the Council and therefore spend little time outside exposed to sunlight. Those that spend any time outside are exposed to the sun and their skins darken with the exposure."

"I bet if you could see a newborn, the baby would be fair skinned," Rodney put in. "It's over time that the tanning takes place and with all the sunlight it would be hard not to become tanned. The 'Council' spends little time outside and therefore are not exposed to the sun."

"Which is why Lize wants you to at least be here," Teyla admitted ruefully, "to make sure we have permission to make trade agreements for Atlantis."

"I'll bet travelers with only dark skin members don't even get into the city," Ronon offered. "They refuse them on the road and send them right back to the Gate."

"Well, we can't change that attitude," John decided. "Do we need what they have enough to put up with it?"

Teyla considered. "They seem to have both tormack and tava beans to offer to trade, as well as some fruits that require the warm climate that we have difficulty in finding in too many places." She shrugged. "If you stay with us, I think we can work with this."

"We'll have to consider who we send to do pickup then," John replied. "Don't want to offend anyone on either side of this."

"We can send Lorne and Parrish, if nothing else," Rodney offered. "Parrish is even whiter than I am, for heaven's sake. You'd think as a botanist he'd be outside more but maybe he's sensible and wears sun screen."

"No one wears sun screen like you do," John replied dryly.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Rodney squawked. But John could see a small grin.

Teyla put a hand on Rodney's arm. "Not that place for that discussion," she said gently.

"All right," Rodney settled down.

"Oh, good," John realized. "Now I really have to pay attention." It wasn't until the words were out of his mouth that he realized how it sounded.

Teyla shot him a look that he knew meant he should always pay attention.

"Ronon? You see anything that's looked like a personal weapon?" John asked. "Those robes can hide too much."

Ronon shrugged. "Don't think so. They don't move like they know how to defend themselves."

"Keep an eye on them anyway," John said, somewhat unnecessarily, he knew. But he had to say it anyway.

Moving back toward the end of the room where they had been sitting before, John moved his chair slightly closer to Teyla in an obvious show of support.

Only from knowing Teyla could John see that the negotiation was not progressing as well as she would like. He paid closer attention to Lize but he couldn't read the man to know if he was stringing them along or not.

After about another hour and a half of polite nothings, John waited for what seemed like a good moment and put in, "We appreciate your hospitality but perhaps we might consider visiting another day?"

Lize seemed faintly taken aback that John would walk away without completing a deal, as John hoped.

"No, no," Lize soothed. "Please. We would like you to stay for the evening meal. Only when the sun starts to set can you see our city better."

Ah! Waiting for at least dusk, if not nightfall, although John wondered what there was to see if there wasn't much in the way of lighting that didn't involve sunlight. But meeting closer to or after sunset made sense on a planet where the sunshine was a fierce as it was on this one. Getting back to the Gate in the dark would be easy enough, although the thought of all that open land made him faintly uneasy for some reason.

With a quick glance at John, Teyla answered, "We would be honored to stay for the evening meal. We will be required to check in with our home" – they had learned to try not to admit to being from Atlantis too soon the hard way – "to reassure those that sent us that we are well."

"But certainly!" Lize agreed.

John debated before he turned to Ronon. "It's about time we checked in. Why don't you do that and we will stay and talk with our new friends." Ronon could make it to the Gate and back on his own faster than any of the rest of them. Being an open, flat road would make it relatively simple even with the heat. "Let them know we'll probably be here until night and we'll check in again in four hours."

Four hours should bring them past nightfall and at that point they could decide if they wanted to stay or if it would be better if they left.

Ronon nodded and went off quickly.

John could see Rodney shifting in his seat, bored with the negotiations, but wasn't going to let him off anywhere on his own. He didn't like sending Ronon out alone but knew Ronon wouldn't do anything stupid with the rest of them still in the city. Not that Rodeny would do stupid on purpose, just that John worried.

"Perhaps we could take a short break?" Teyla suggested to Lize, picking up on John's concern for Rodney.

"Certainly," Lize agreed. He looked around and saw the serving woman hovering near the door. "Some more refreshments for our guests," he ordered. She went off without a word.

More fruit and drink was brought and John was glad to see a container that looked like just water for Rodney since they didn't want to risk the drink they had earlier. Water was usually safe but John took a drink of it just to make sure.

"Good to go," he let Rodney know.

"Thanks," Rodney replied softly. He looked over the fruit, "Can you try some of that apple-looking thing for me?"

"Sure," John said. He grabbed the fruit Rodney had indicated and used his knife to cut a piece from it. It actually crunched like an apple but, "Tastes... sour berry-ish, I think. Nowhere like that purple fruit from P3X-477."

Rodney made a face in agreement. The botanists said that fruit was nutritious but it was sour enough to discourage anyone from eating it raw. It took too much sugar to make it even semi-palatable, cooking it made an awful odor and they had given up on it reluctantly. This was a bearable level of sour and juicy enough to make it edible.

"Thanks," Rodney took the rest of the piece John offered to him. He nibbled about the edges and made a small face at the sour taste but kept taking small bites.

John watched Rodney nibble the fruit, and watched as a small stream of juice snuck down Rodney's chin.

"Umm... you got..." John pointed to Rodney. "Your chin..."

Rodney used the back of his hand to wipe up his chin and then looked around for a napkin before wiping his hand on his pants.

"Nice, McKay," John teased.

Rodney blushed, a look John suddenly found inexplicably charming. He tamped down the response he wanted to give, fighting for a friendly grin instead of.... John firmly refused to consider anything else.

They sat back down at the negotiation table, Rodney off to one side tapping away on his datapad. Knowing Rodney had found something to keep himself busy, John focused on the ongoing negotiation, become more actively involved in the discussion since Lize truly seemed reluctant to negotiate seriously with Teyla. John let Teyla guide his responses, which didn't seem to bother Lize as much.

Ronon returned while they were still negotiating trade for a variety of foods for both medicine and information on solar energy. John looked at Rodney at one point and asked softly, "Do we have any solar panels we can trade?"

Rodney shrugged, "More than likely. They can see what they can reverse engineer from that."

"Thanks," John replied and turned back to Lize. "We can add what we call solar panels. They help capture the energy from the sun to store for use later."

Lize nodded, giving nothing away, which had been the frustrating part to John. Lize seemed to be the only one authorized to speak on behalf of the Lanzanians but he was giving them no signals to know if the negotiations was going well or poorly. Teyla was really just as good, showing a serene face throughout, it was just frustrating to John who admitted to himself he just wasn't used to this.

Dusk started to fall which resulted in the Council Chamber starting to grow dim. Knowing that the room light was dependent on sunshine, it was less surprising that it would have been otherwise.

As women in the servant's uniform brought in lamps for the room, Lize said, "We can adjourn to rest before the evening meal, if you wish."

John looked around at his team, Ronon gave a small shrug and Rodney packed up his laptop. "We'd be happy to take a break," John returned.

Ronon leaned in and said in a low voice for only John and Teyla, "Something's odd. Told Chuck that if they don't hear from us on time to send a cloaked Jumper."

John raised an eyebrow. "Odd?"

"Can't put a finger on it but I had an escort all the way to the Gate and back," Ronon explained. "Like they were worried I was going go exploring someplace else. They also seemed interested in how I got the message through the Gate without going through it."

Rodney joined them on that last sentence. "There's no radio transmissions, they don't know about chemical batteries and there's nothing resembling even steam or hydro power although they probably use simple water pressure to move water through pipes," he put in. "I did some more analysis and can't be more specific without more detailed work but I'm positive there's a serious lack of heavy metals, at least at the surface. So, little to no copper or iron near the surface means no bronze and little metalwork."

"This building?" John asked.

Rodney shrugged. "Mostly carved out of the face of the cliff surface, I would think. Anything else is earthen or vegetation based. Although pottery and some glass is to be expected."

"Okay," John replied. "Thanks." He looked to Ronon and Teyla, "We okay to stay past sunset?"

Ronon shrugged and Teyla said, "I think we need to take care to not become separated, based on what we know. Together we should be fine."

"Thanks," John said. He turned to Lize who was obviously waiting for a response, "We would be glad to join you for the evening meal."

Lize nodded. He turned to the now-ubiquitous serving woman and directed, "Show our guests to the Visitors Room so they can rest before the evening meal." He turned to John, "Please rest and be comfortable. Someone will come for you when it is time for the meal."

She nodded and waited for them to follow her without saying a word. Now that John thought about it, none of the women they had seen had said anything.

They went out of the Government Building and John was struck by the heat, even in the shadow of the cliff. She took them down three buildings to a single-story building against the cliff which was essentially on the very edge of the settlement. It stuck out from the cliff more than the neighboring building but otherwise didn't look too different. She held open the door and waited for them to enter.

Seeing no obvious locking mechanism, so they couldn't easily be locked in, John entered and the others followed. The woman closed the door behind them, leaving them alone.

The air inside this building wasn't quite as warm as the outside air but not anything like the coolness of the Government Building. It wasn't too uncomfortable at this moment.

The room they entered had a couple of couches and there was another door on the rear wall. Checking it out, it was essentially a slightly more primitive version of the bathroom they had used earlier – a stool over a hole and a trickle of water constantly running through a basin. Solid looking walls were on the far side, so it was obviously built against but not far into the cliff. Probably took advantage of a niche in the cliff, he thought.

"Bathroom," he announced. "Teyla?" he offered.

"Thank you," she replied, going into the room, pulling the door shut behind her.

They took turns and were soon settled around the room, waiting on the call for dinner.

"What do you think would happen if we wandered around?" John asked Ronon.

"Probably be escorted back," Ronon offered. "Nothing much to look at anyway."

"At lunch, were there any men doing the serving?" John asked.

He could see the others thinking. "No..." Teyla admitted. "All the servers were women, although there were women being served at other tables."

"A combination of color bias and sexism?" Rodney asked.

"I think so," John said. "The Council members were all men and the servers were all female," he explained. "So Teyla suffers from a double whammy here. No wonder you didn't get anywhere."

"It may be as you say," she replied. "Atlantis may be better served if we were to leave and another team continues the negotiations."

"All military, I think," Ronon put in. At John's silent question, "Still nothing but..."

"I know," John admitted. "If they didn't have both tormack and tava beans, I'd just give up on them. But let's see how dinner goes before we make any decisions."

"I think that is a good suggestion," Teyla agreed.

Darkness continued to fall, the room they were in had no artificial light provided to them. Sitting in the dark on a comfortable chair pushed John toward sleepiness. He looked at Ronon who had not settled down and closed his eyes. Just for a minute...

"Sheppard!" Ronon's terse call had him awake instantly. "Wraith!"

"Mother-fuckers!" John bit out. He rose from the couch, grateful to see Teyla at the ready and Rodney silently packing up what little he had gotten out. "What's happening?"

"Can't hear the gate from here but I can hear a dart in the air," Ronon reported. "I don't think this building will protect us from a culling beam."

"Let's get out of here anyway," John decided. "Maybe we can lose them in the dark."

"Nowhere to hide," Teyla reminded him.

"I know but here we're sitting ducks," John replied, calm kicking in now that the adrenaline was starting to pump through his body. "Let's head even further from the city along the cliff."

"Good enough," Ronon answered, opening the door. "Gotta go now."

"Go!" John commanded. "Rodney, stay close," He was glad to see Rodney not complain and simply hustle out of the building after Ronon. "Teyla, I'm right behind you."

John could hear the whine of the dart get closer as he stepped out of the door. He quickly moved toward the others, hugging the cliff. Luckily, the ground was clear and relatively smooth so that they were able to move away from the building.

The dart put its culling beam down just as it swooped over the building, pulling straight up to clear the cliff. The precision of the maneuver indicated that this wasn't the first time that this had happened.

"Wraith worshippers!" he heard Ronon mutter behind him.

"Keep moving!" John ordered sharply. "We need to be further away from here."

Ronon led the way, keeping an eye on Rodney John was glad to see, as they quick-marched along the edge of the cliff. Ronon found an indentation under an outcropping of rock before he stopped. They barely fit and John turned to watch the dart criss-cross the open land in front of them.

"Probably no real caves in the immediate area," Ronon said.

"Yeah, so their offerings can't get away," Rodney agreed. "How much longer until we've missed our check-in?"

John was more than faintly worried because they were moving away from the Gate at this point. "At least an hour," he said. "We have to hang on for a while." The only consolation was they had all their ammunition and had the cliff to their back. But having their weapons wouldn't be useful at all if they were in a culling buffer. Taking a Dart down with just P90s was possible but not something John wanted to try.

Standing still and just watching was frustrating. He was glad that Ronon and Teyla shuffled Rodney to the very inside of the niche so that he hopefully was in the most secure position. Not that Rodney couldn't handle himself on a Wraith ship, he had proved himself more than capable too many times, but he worried that there would come a time that Rodney couldn't pull off the miracle they needed and he didn't want that to be this time. Losing Rodney was something John didn't want to ever have to think about and he'd do anything to protect him.

The dart landed very close to the city but in the dark they couldn't see if anyone came out to talk to the Wraith. It lifted after a short time and continued to scour the open ground. The Wraith much have some idea of where they were and more than one pass came close to their bolt hole. John held his breath as the culling beam came close, as if not breathing would help hide them.

From their location, John looked toward the city. If he hadn't known it was there, he'd have thought the city was nothing more than the village on the plain. None of the upper stories were lit at all.

"They go into the cliff!" John realized. "Rodney? Remember that tunnel into the cliff from the Hall of Records? I'll bet it's for more than the cool air, they also use it to hide from the Wraith."

"Are they Wraith worshippers or not, then?" Rodney demanded. "Hey! Watch it, I'm getting squashed back here."

"Yes," Ronon replied firmly. "And you're fine."

"Perhaps... not all," Teyla proposed as she shifted slightly to give Rodney a bit more room. "Those that do not agree can hide in the cliff."

"Whatever," John wasn't going to quibble whether everyone on the planet was a Wraith worshipper or not. Someone obviously had called the Wraith on them, which pissed John off.

"Calling Colonel Sheppard," Lorne's voice came over the radio.

"Wraith," John replied immediately. "One dart is all we've seen but no idea if more are on the way."

"Roger that," Lorne replied. "Are you safe and can you get to the Gate at all?"

"Negative on the gate," John replied. "We're pinned down against the cliff and it's all open between here and anywhere. But no one is hurt."

"Got it," Lorne replied. "Atlantis, send that second Jumper."

John realized the Gate must still be open for Lorne to be calling for reinforcements; they couldn't see or hear the Gate from where they were. Lorne had taken Ronon's caution seriously by having a second Jumper on standby.

"I have your position," Lorne informed them. "Stay where you are while we take care of this guy."

It was frustrating to watch the small air battle from a relatively unsecure position. A Jumper uncloaked a short ways to their left but its shields were obviously up when the Wraith fired on it. A second Jumper appeared higher and off to an angle from the first and fired dead-on to the dart, which exploded brightly in the dark night.

The first Jumper settled down close to their position and lowered the rear hatch. John made sure Teyla and Rodney were ahead of him and Ronon as they crossed the open space.

"Good to go," John announced as they cleared and the hatch closed behind them. John moved to the front of the craft and saw Lorne and one of the newer Marines piloting. "Thanks for the lift."

"Happy to be of service," Lorne grinned. "Anything need to be done here?"

"Nope," John replied. "Let's go home."

"Jumper six, let's go home," Lorne said over the radio. The trip back to the gate was much shorter in the Jumper and they dialed Atlantis with no further incident.

Through the front shield of the Jumper, John saw Sam Carter in the control room as they entered the city. He gave an informal salute and she nodded as the Jumper was moved to the Jumper bay.

Dr. Keller was there to meet them and seeing that no one was hurt said, "Standard medical checkup first."

"Yay," Rodney replied sarcastically.

They handed their weapons and tac vests to waiting Marines and strolled over to the infirmary. They were directed to separate beds and John sat down, resigned to the process. He was yawning when Keller came around the curtain to see him.

"Tired?" she asked, too casually for John's comfort.

"Just the adrenaline wearing off," he explained, just as casually. "Actually an easy day, at least until the surprise ending. And it is evening." Lanzania and Atlantis hadn't been too far off in time so they had left early morning local time and it was now after dinner.

"You know the drill," she said. A quick but thorough check up was completed in short order but not before John suppressed a couple more yawns. "Good to go," Keller announced, "but I still don't like some of your tests, Colonel. Your blood pressure is a bit high and you're looking tired. Are you sleeping okay?"

Between the nightmares, you mean? "Yeah, mostly okay," he put her off. "Just need a couple of quiet days."

"I'll be keeping an eye on you," she warned. "You've been tired for a while now and you need more sleep than you've been getting."

This was an old argument, not worth having at the moment. "Anything else?" he forced himself to ask calmly.

"No," she had to admit. "You're free to go."

John got up, somewhat relieved yet vaguely disappointed that the rest of his team had already left. He wandered back to his room and, dropping his clothes in the basket he had gotten from the Athosians at some point, he went into the bathroom to take a shower.

After a long, hot shower, he came out and pulled on clean boxers and a t-shirt. He lay down on the bed, hoping he could sleep for a bit. The low hum of the air system sang a lullaby as he drifted off.

The nightmare had him sitting bolt upright in the bed, shaking and ready to move... nowhere.... He shook his head to get the last of the images out of his memory... it was a variation on a constant theme – Wraith, Rodney and too much blood.

He looked at the clock, at least this time he got almost three hours of sleep before he was rudely woken up. Knowing he wouldn't sleep any more at this point, he got up and pulled on a clean t-shirt. Seeing how he was almost out of clean clothes, he decided that now was as good a time to do laundry as any. He threw a couple more things that were suspect and the towels from the bathroom into his basket and picked it up.

After midnight was usually hit-or-miss on the laundry. John was glad to see no one else there tonight so there was no one to try to make small talk with. The immediate impression from the nightmare was gone but it always left a dull headache that he knew better than to go to the infirmary for, yet it took a couple of hours to wear off.

The Ancient 'laundry' was a combination of sonic cleaning for items that only needed freshening up and a washer/dryer combination jerry-rigged by the scientists for clothes that were stained or greasy. The sonic process didn't do stains and grease justice and most of the expedition used the familiar water and soap option when they could. The dryer was cool, though, using a combination of mild heat and microwaves to dry the wettest item in no time at all.

Sitting in the laundry room was soothing, the hum of the machinery comforting. He knew it was the city trying to reach out to him in its own way. His headache was mostly gone by the time his laundry was done.

Carefully folding his clothes, John repacked his basket and went back to his room without meeting up with anyone. He somehow even missed the routine patrol that he knew was on duty but knew he was on the security cameras that covered the city.

Back in his room, he put everything away and looked at a clock. Three AM wasn't exactly a good time for a run and the nightmare earlier made him reluctant to try sleeping again. Mission report, he decided. Might as well get that out of the way.

Checking his messages, he noted that Carter had a debriefing scheduled for after breakfast. They had had some hope for this contact but since it didn't end well they'd have to look for other options. He started on the report and when that was done, started on some of the paperwork Lorne had forwarded to him.

The chime on his room brought him up for air. Looking at the time, it would be Ronon looking for their morning run. He went to the door and said to the waiting man, "Five minutes?"

Ronon nodded and leaned against the wall in the corridor. John shut down the computer, used the bathroom and slipped into his running sneakers. When he exited the room, Ronon pushed off from the wall and they moved off to their usual path.

John was breathing heavily by the time they were done, faintly annoyed that Ronon was hardly puffing. They had run the three miles in silence and at the end, Ronon said, "See you at breakfast."

John nodded and went off to his room to shower and pull on his uniform for the day. There was a small crowd for breakfast and John could see Ronon already seated at their usual table. John got his own breakfast and automatically grabbed an extra muffin when he saw they were the near-blueberry, even if it was bright yellow, that Rodney particularly liked.

Teyla joined them as Ronon was finishing up and John was eyeing the extra muffin when Rodney sat down, complaining that there were no muffins left and breakfast wasn't anywhere near over.

"Saved one for you," John said over his rant, placing the muffin on Rodney's tray.

"Really?" Rodney smiled and pulled the muffin closer to his plate. "Thanks!" He smiled at John and John had to look away before he started staring.

Ronon got up to leave and John reminded him, "Debriefing at nine."

"Be there," Ronon assured him, taking his tray back before leaving the cafeteria.

"As will I," Teyla added, as she also got up to leave.

"What? I get here and everyone leaves?" Rodney complained.

"Need help eating?" John teased. "Let me get more coffee, okay?" Rodney nodded and John refilled his coffee cup and brought Rodney back an extra.

"What else you got planned? After?" John asked.

"Well, all that sun yesterday gave me some ideas that we might be able to use more solar energy in the city," he replied around the muffin. "If we used more solar energy, we could open up some more housing space without having to stress the ZedPM."

"More housing? Really?" John asked. "Where?"

"Couple of towers over," Rodney nodded off toward local North. "That would give us some real apartments and spread us out in the city so we aren't all in one location if we are attacked. It would be easy enough to move back in case of an emergency but upgraded living space would be nice."

"If the transporters were down?" John asked.

"Lots of stairs but otherwise a clear route," Rodney assured him.

"Sounds good," John approved. "I'd like to see it."

"Sure," Rodney shrugged. "Have my eye on a couple of places that look interesting."

"You haven't been exploring on your own?" John demanded, worried.

"No, no!" Rodney hastened to reply. "Sensors, the city database and we have some cameras that we've brought online." He looked up at John. "If you have time, we can go and look. If you want."

"Sounds interesting," he answered. "Let's get through this debriefing first."

"Okay," Rodney swallowed the last of his coffee. "See you there."

John took his own tray back and went to his office to check for any other messages before the meeting and found that Carter had pushed the debriefing back to 2 pm. John sighed and rubbed his forehead briefly. He decided to do some in-person inspections and wandered out into the city.

None of the rest of his team was there when he went for lunch so he picked through a sandwich, drank more coffee and went back to work. The lack of sleep started to come back to haunt him, bringing the dull headache with it. He cadged some aspirin from the nurse on duty, avoiding Keller. It would be noted on his chart, he knew, but needed some help to get through the rest of the day.

As they finally sat around the tableand after they reviewed what had happened, Samantha Carter asked, "Is there any chance we can convince these people that the Wraith aren't gods?"

John looked up from the doodling he had been using to keep him awake, if not fully aware, and snarled before he could stop himself, "Ever have any luck convincing a Prior that the Ori weren't worth worshipping?"

In the stunned silence that followed, John stood and walked to the door. "Fuck it. I'm done here," he threw over his shoulder. John didn't remember the trip but found himself sitting on a step on the South pier. They didn't go there much since it was pretty mangled from the asteroid belt encounter on the trip to their current planet. They hadn't had time or manpower to start repair work this far from the center of the city.

He thought about the mission. About what he could have done differently – his mind was a blank. He leaned back on his elbows and looked up to the now-familiar starfield. Back on Earth, he hadn't paid as much attention but Rodney's fascination with the local stars had rubbed off on John and he could identify those stars that shone even in the dusk that was approaching.

John rubbed his forehead, the ever-present headache had come back with a vengeance and he was so tired. He closed his eyes, not to sleep but to rest. Even before coming to Atlantis, sleep wasn't always an escape from the memories that haunted him. Now he had new images to add to the dreams that were mostly nightmares.

He sighed, knowing he couldn't let the dreams win for here he had more to lose. He loved this job and it would be disrespectful to what Elizabeth had done for him to not do it to the best of ability. This city was a home he had never known back on Earth, it talked to him and he knew it wanted to help him but didn't know how.

And then there was Rodney McKay. Brash, brave, insensitive, awkward and faithful. A friend like he had never had before, one he didn't want to lose. Even in the solitude of his own mind he skittered away from anything more. Screwing up here meant losing Rodney.

Resigned to having to apologize to Carter, later, he laid his head back on the step above where he sat and tried to stop thinking about anything.

It was dusk, almost dark, when footsteps came up behind him. Rodney. The scientist slid onto the step to sit beside him. In silence they watched the last of the sun set and the rest of the stars start to come out.

As it became fully dark, Rodney bumped a shoulder into John. "Trust me?"

John turned to look at the other man. "Rodney?"

"Trust me." Not a question, a statement.

John looked into clear blue eyes. "Yes."

Rodney nodded satisfaction. He touched his earpiece. "Ronon? Give us twenty minutes. Tell Zelenka twenty-five." He stood and spoke to John, "Come on, we have to keep moving."

"What are you planning, McKay?" There was some underlying suspicion in the question but mostly curiosity.

"No time for chit-chat. You had to come all the way out here to sulk, so we'll have to keep moving to do this quietly," Rodney answered. John didn't think it really was an answer but evidently it was as much as he was going to get for the moment.

They moved faster once they reached the transporter system. One transfer and John found they had emerged just outside the Jumper bay. Rodney strode to a Jumper that looked to be under repair. "Two minutes, then you can power it up," Rodney pointed to the pilot seat, indicating John should get ready. Rodney moved purposefully, reseating crystals and securing loose panels and in less than his two minutes he was sliding into the copilot seat next to John. John heard Rodney murmur on the radio, "Zelenka? We're ready."

"What now?" John asked as he powered up the Jumper.

"Down to the gate room," Rodney answered.

Deciding he had played along this far, John engaged the automated sequence that would take the Jumper into the gate room. As the system positioned the Jumper in front of the gate, John took a quick look around which showed Zelenka manning the control seat that Chuck usually occupied, Lorne standing behind him and no one else in the room. Well, except for Ronon on the second level walkway, who seemed to have Carter trapped in her office overlooking the Control Room. John vaguely hoped Carter didn't give Ronon too much grief for whatever they were doing.

Rodney dialed a gate address from the Jumper. The gate activated and Rodney snapped, "You've seen this before, nothing new, let's get going."

John activated the Jumper and flew through the gate. It was full sunlight on the other side, probably mid-day local time, clear weather and no welcoming committee. A nice change, actually. "And now?" John drawled.

"South relative to the gate, about half an hour at medium speed there'll be a lake. Set down there," Rodney directed. He got up and started poking through some of the boxes packed into the back of the Jumper. A satisfied "mmm" of approval floated up to John several times.

"Want to let me in on the plan?" John asked.

"Not yet," Rodney replied. "Plenty of time."

Maybe all the time in the world, John thought to himself. Hope we have something to go back to.... But at this exact moment that thought wasn't as awful as it could have been. That alone told him he wasn't doing too well – he could only hope he didn't take Rodney down with him.

"This your lake?" John asked as the HUD indicated a body of water ahead. Rodney sat back down in the copilot seat, tapped at the laptop he had gotten out during the flight.

"Yes. There should be... okay, right there. Open field against the treeline there," Rodney pointed. John followed the directions and settled the Jumper down.

"How'd you know this was here?" John was curious.

Rodney shifted in a way that told John whatever he had done wasn't quite legal. Rodney answered, "Sent a UAV through the gate. Figured that since we needed to run some field experiments with it that we might as well get some useful information from it." He grinned, "Worked really well, if you must know."

"Where are we?" John asked.

"I'll get to that..." Rodney started.

"Now, Rodney," John declared firmly, not moving from his seat. "I'm not going anyplace until you tell me what's going on."

Rodney kept silent. John started to calculate pi in his head, hoping he looked like he could hold out all day, and got to seventy five places before Rodney started to squirm. At a hundred and seventy-five places Rodney started talking. "Okay, we're on P3X-847. The place where Bates got tava beans that time we discovered the Genii had a teeny bunker problem. There weren't that many people living in this direction then so if we stay away from any towns or farms, which are mostly in the other direction from the gate, no one will know we're here. Satisfied?"

"Manara? Why are we here?" John had to ask. "And why aren't the Manarans protecting their gate?"

Rodney rolled his eyes but John caught a tinge of pink around his ears. "Officially, we're on vacation. Something Elizabeth..." Rodney stuttered over the name, "Elizabeth approved a while ago. She wanted you to take a week, you argued for only two days and you both compromised on four. The entire correspondence trail is there. Sam doesn't know our system yet so she won't know how we did the hack."

"We?" John made the one syllable sound like a paragraph.

"Well, someone needed to know where we were going, so Zelenka and Lorne know where we are. Zelenka's monitoring an experimental subspace transmitter that's on the Jumper so we don't have to check in at all – it sends a distress signal if we power down the Jumper completely or trigger a distress call. Officially, Lorne only knows that you turned command over to him for the four days. And since we dialed the gate from the Jumper everyone can deny knowing anything. We don't have a good redial program yet, so Sam can't track us," Rodney explained.

"You've gone to a lot of trouble," John started.

"Pah! After stealing a ZedPM from the Replicators, this was a cakewalk," Rodney assured him. "Okay, since we're vacationing, we can – I can't believe I'm saying this – set up camp. Come on, you don't think I'm doing all the heavy lifting here, do you?" Rodney grabbed a tent and hauled it outside the Jumper. "Not too far from the Jumper. I have something I want to try later."

Giving in to the inevitable and ignoring that Rodney hadn't answered his question about the Manarans, John followed Rodney out of the Jumper and picked a spot for the tent. They were finished relatively quickly based on their experience in setting it up regularly, after learning – the hard way a couple of times –it was often safer to bring their own housing. The four man tent was roomy enough for the two of them and if the weather got bad they could move back to the Jumper or even go back to Atlantis. Going right back to Atlantis wasn't something he wanted to do at the moment, John realized, surprised at his reaction.

"I want to check out the immediate area," John told Rodney as they finished up. "I won't go out of sight."

"Go ahead. Nothing on the life sign detector so we're alone here, not even any large animals," Rodney offered.

"This is Pegasus," John replied by way of explanation.

"Yeah, okay," Rodney had to agree. "Go ahead."

John walked a wide perimeter around the Jumper. The trees provided possible protection from the wind and weather from that direction, the open field showed no signs of animal trails but there were signs of smaller burrowing animals that John would classify as rodents – maybe something like gophers or prairie dogs. Nothing close to where they had parked the Jumper so he wasn't worried about animals. There was no sign of larger animals, much less humans. But like Rodney had said, this was Pegasus and he knew not to take anything for granted.

Rodney had set up a small fire pit while he was walking but hadn't lit a fire. Since it was getting late in the afternoon and the sun was starting to drop behind the trees, Rodney fussed around the campsite. He walked pretty much the same perimeter that John had just walked.

John followed Rodney – by sheer habit he didn't let Rodney wander off anywhere on his own. "What are you doing?" he asked curiously.

"It's a perimeter alarm. Something we've been working on in the lab that we should have done ages ago. Set the devices at least three points, five are better, around a Jumper and once it's set it'll kick in the shield if it's tripped." Rodney held out a device the same size as a life sign detector and pointed, "You can set sensitivity down to the insect level or, probably more practical, to the house cat size." Rodney handed John a smaller device. "We can go out through the shield but you need a remote to get back in or turn it off. It's the same remote that hides and locks the Jumper so it's only one device to carry. Although," he said proudly, "I've coded this set to our sub-q transmitters so we can't lock ourselves out."

"Rodney, great idea," John enthused. "Maybe if I wasn't dragging you around so much you'd get to do more things like this for us."

"This? This isn't brilliant," Rodney dismissed. "Any reasonably competent engineer could have done this. No one thought to hook it to a Jumper, is all." He looked at John pointedly. "And I wouldn't have known we needed such a thing if you hadn't been hauling my ass all over this galaxy, so stop."

John hadn't thought about it that way but it didn't make him feel any better about what he had put Rodney through over the last couple of years.

Rodney dug into his bag and handed John another device. "Since you're the muscle on this operation, you can blow up our air mattress. I'm not sleeping on the ground if I can have any say in that matter, either." He tossed John a cylindrical device.

John hefted it for a moment and felt the familiar tingle of Ancient tech. "An air pump?"

"Okay, that one is kinda brilliant. It's from the water plant and originally was part of a water pump. Zelenka and I retro fit it so it'll pump air but it'll only work if you have the gene," Rodney admitted.

As John unrolled the air mattress, he called out to Rodney, "Hey! Where'd you get a queen size air mattress? Didn't know we had that sort of thing."

Rodney came over, "Interestingly enough, got that from Carson." A moment of silence that wasn't as hard as it used to be. "It was part of the supplies for the original expedition. Had a foot pump that would have taken two days to inflate that size mattress. He told me they weren't sure of finding beds and if someone needed to be kept off the ground, an air mattress would be better for that. He never did tell me why they had one this size."

The mattress pretty much filled the tent from wall to wall and it would be much better than sleeping on the ground, John knew. Since they had the Jumper, they didn't need much extra space for storing their backpacks like they would normally have on a mission. The mattress was cool, but might not be practical to take along on a regular basis he decided.

Dinner was sandwiches, "Turkey mostly," Rodney grumbled, fruit that looked like apples but tasted like peaches, and fruit juice. "Beer would taste good about now," Rodney allowed.

They sat around the unlit fire pit. While a fire would be nice, it also would alert both animals and people that they were there. Better to be sure and light a fire tomorrow, John figured. The weather was also nice enough that they didn't need a fire for heat. Again, if the weather turned nasty they could retreat to the Jumper.

"Yeah, it would," John agreed. "Tell me about the Manarans," John prompted.

Rodney ate some of his sandwich and John let him take his time.

"After... after the Genii," Rodney started, "we knew that the Manarans couldn't be trusted. And if they would turn on us, who only knew who else they'd turn on." He took a bite of the fruit and chewed that for a bit. "So, well, as part of another experiment, I had a team move their gate from the edge of their city to a place a couple hours away. So it's not as easy to get to but we haven't cut them off."

"Rodney!"

Rodney shot him a withering look. "They hurt us. They were as responsible for those two Marines dying as the Genii. What kind of message do you think it sends if we didn't do anything?"

"But..." John protested. "That was almost three years ago!"

"And we moved their gate almost two years ago," Rodney replied calmly. "And warned them that we'd move it even further away if they didn't play along."

John just stared. As he thought about it, he remembered a handful of "experiments" from the science department that he had essentially ignored. He had tuned out Rodney's reports in staff meetings and skimmed over the written reports that Rodney copied him on. He wasn't sure he wanted to ask what else Rodney was doing without consulting with him.

As it got fully dark, they climbed into their sleeping bags. The weather wasn't terribly cool and the lightweight sleeping bag would be like a cozy blanket.It had been night when they left Atlantis and with the extra hours they had spent on the planet, it had been a long day. John readily fell asleep.

John felt someone holding him down and he started to struggle – he had to get free. There was a weight on him, holding him down and he fought harder. Then a voice – Rodney's voice! – came through, "Sheppard. John. Stop. Don't fight me."

"R'ney?"

"Yes, you idiot. It's me. Stop," Rodney commanded, but didn't let go or move.

Waking enough to realize it really was Rodney, John relaxed and savored the safe feeling of Rodney's weight on him. Then he realized what he was doing and reflexively stiffened. He felt Rodney move away and he regretted... John fell back asleep without completing the thought.

Neither referred to the incident the morning, which left John faintly relieved yet he knew it wasn't like Rodney to leave it alone. As they went through their morning routine, Rodney took over the cooking and John enjoyed the feeling of having nothing to do. Even in McMurdo there had been things he was 'supposed' to be doing. After a breakfast of coffee and pastry, he didn't mean to fall asleep but the next thing he knew was Rodney shaking him and his voice saying sharply, "John! Wake up!"

In his mostly asleep state, John sat up and put his arms around Rodney and just hung on. He found himself panting, like he had been running hard, and only Rodney's firm hold brought him back.

"Sorry," John mumbled into Rodney's shoulder.

"How long have you been not sleeping?" Rodney asked gently but firmly.

"On and off. Mostly since we got here," John admitted slowly, meaning since they had gotten to Atlantis but hoping Rodney wouldn't take it that way. He shrugged. "Better sometimes than others. I've managed."

"Not well lately," Rodney told him bluntly. "Ronon, Teyla and I have noticed." John tried to move but Rodney held him firmly. "I can't make you talk, but... well, I'm here." John heard the thread of uncertainty in that last offer, but all he could do was nod, hoping Rodney would understand.

It must have been enough since Rodney let him go. "Okay, no napping," he declared. "Since I also seem to have been elected the entertainment director, let's go."

"Huh? Go?"

"Come on. We need to check out the lake to see if it's safe for swimming. It'll be nice to walk some place without being chased," Rodney explained. John must have reacted to the statement because Rodney rolled his eyes and said firmly, "Stop that."

"I..." Deep breath. "I'll try, okay?"

"Better. Now come on," Rodney directed. He rummaged in the Jumper and brought out an extra life sign detector. "Here. Let's see what we can find," he said handing John the device.

They walked in silence to the lake. It was actually a nice walk, semi-shaded, ankle length grass and smooth. If he didn't know better, it was a walk on a garden path. John stopped for a moment, closed his eyes and took a deep breath before letting it out. He felt Rodney stop beside him. After a moment, they continued their walk.

They stopped at the edge of the water and then moved so they could sit on some rocks that were a short way down the shore from where they stood. John could see the far side of the lake but figured it was almost a mile to the other side, much further than he would want to swim, and he couldn't see either end from their location on shore. The land curved around on either side of them so they were actually on the edge of a small bay.

Rodney fussed with the device in his hands. John did a full 360 degree circle, scanning with the LSD. He stopped and scanned the lake for a few minutes. "Little signs I would assume are fish, but nothing too large. Not even large enough to be good eating probably. Might be bigger fish in deeper, can't tell," he reported. "Doesn't mean that the fish aren't dangerous, we've learned that the hard way, but looks as good as it gets."

Rodney shrugged. "Nothing in the database, but that's nothing new."

"How long have you been planning this?" John finally had to ask.

Rodney stilled and was silent for a long time before he started speaking. "Well, it was for me originally," he admitted ruefully. "After Doranda... well, I wasn't doing so well and wanted an escape hatch. So I started thinking about what it would take to get away from Atlantis without having to go too far. Even then I wasn't going to go back to Earth. We don't make it easy you know," he laughed softly. "I... things got better but I tinkered on and off since then. The last six months, since you faced down Kolya, we could see something was wrong." He shook his head as John started to protest. "Okay, it was mostly Teyla. She asked me to keep an eye on you and if you had her worried, then I knew it was serious." He shrugged. "I had to trust Zelenka to watch for us. Someone needed to know what was going on in order to let us back in. Although you owe him big time, now."

"Me? You're the one who kidnapped me," John had to protest. Not that he really minded, but he wasn't going to let Rodney off the hook that easily.

Rodney grinned. "Told him we were working on some new security protocols but he saw right through that. Officially, he's covered so Sam can't blame him for anything. It was Zelenka's idea to bring in Lorne so that two people know where we are. If they need us, they can get us back pretty quickly."

John hoped he didn't look as stunned as he felt. All these people watching over him? He was supposed to be watching them and he had never expected they would want to watch over him in return.

Rodney's device beeped just then and he looked at the screen. He tapped a couple of commands on the keyboard and announced, "Nothing immediately toxic, should be safe. Let's go swimming." He put the computer down and started to take off his clothes. "Come on, it's not Club Med but as close as we're going to get while we're here."

John bent over to unlace his boots, eased them off and pulled his t-shirt over his head. He glanced over to see a naked Rodney walking into the water and his mouth went dry. Damn, Rodney had become pretty buff since they had come to Pegasus. He was so screwed.....

"Water's not quite cold, come on," Rodney threw over his shoulder as he waded in.

John took a deep breath to control himself, waiting for Rodney to turn away before he walked the few feet to the water's edge and waded in. Rodney was right – the water wasn't quite cold but could be if the weather became any cooler. John struck out to join Rodney in the middle of the cove. It was deep enough to swim in but really was only shoulder deep. Away from the rocky edge, the bottom was mostly silt but with little vegetation. The clear water became clouded as they stirred up the bottom.

Rodney lay back to float on the water, giving John more than a glance of fair skin. "Hey! What happened to Mr Skin Cancer?" John had to tease. He paddled in a circle to look at the landscape surrounding the lake and to avoid looking at Rodney. He almost wished the water was colder so he didn't have to worry about what Rodney might think....

"SPF 100, my own making," Rodney calmly told him. "Put it on while you were napping."

"Everywhere?" John asked before he could stop himself.

"Well, there were a couple of spots I had trouble reaching, but it's okay," Rodney answered, much too philosophically to John's frustration. Why should he be disappointed that Rodney didn't ask for help?

They paddled around for a bit, not talking much, when Rodney announced, "I'm going in."

John decided, "Just a few more minutes." He wanted to make sure Rodney had a head start since he knew that all that skin in near proximity was too much to ask of his self control.

"Don't make me come after you fully clothed," Rodney mock-threatened.

"Not long," John had to promise. He knew he had trained Rodney too well – no going off alone when they were away from Atlantis. Rodney would wait.

John made for shore as Rodney finished dressing. He got out and the warm air felt good against his cool skin. John grabbed his t-shirt to use as a towel, dressing as quickly as damp skin allowed. He figured he could get back to the Jumper safely without a t-shirt and hoped it wasn't wishful thinking that Rodney was checking him out on the walk back. He hung his wet shirt on a bush outside the tent and grabbed a fresh shirt from the Jumper. Someone had packed a pack for him with several changes of clothes; he suspected Teyla had done that. "Put extra towels on your list for next time," John told Rodney as they ate more sandwiches and fruit as lunch.

"That would be easier," Rodney allowed. He pointed to John. "Since you're not allowed to nap, you might as well gather firewood. There seems to be reasonable stuff not too far, get enough to cook dinner over tonight."

"Cook what?" John asked. When Rodney hesitated, he explained, "Do you need hot and fast or do you need a longer burning fire?"

"Longer burning," Rodney answered. "We have tormack and almost-chicken. It's something that's hard to mess up."

"There's tormack still available?" John laughed. "I would have thought Ronon would have sniffed it out."

"Teyla, ummm, talked him out of it," Rodney replied with a grin.

"Sounds good," John replied. "Won't go too far." John rummaged through the Jumper and found a small hand axe that would help in breaking up awkward piece of wood. He decided that carrying the P90 would be too awkward but double checked his Beretta to make sure it was loaded as a matter of habit.

They spent the afternoon with John gathering several loads of firewood and Rodney doing various calculations on his computer. John dug more at Rodney's start at a firepit and placed a ring of larger rocks around the outside. He built a grate for cooking from some screening from the Jumper and found a couple of pots for boiling water. John stacked wood in the pit and lit the tinder. Once it was going, he told Rodney, "That'll take about an hour before its ready."

"Hungry?"

"Well, you've had me working all day. I could eat," John allowed with a grin.

"I'll get it started as soon as it's ready, then," Rodney decided. He put his computer aside and dug out supplies from the Jumper.

"I'm going to the lake to clean up," John announced. When Rodney shot him a worried look, he allowed, "Just in enough to clean up. I'll leave my headset on all the time."

"You better," Rodney retorted. "I'm not explaining to Teyla about letting you drown when we're supposed to be on a relatively safe holiday."

John shuddered, "I wouldn't do that to you." He grinned, "She'd drag me out of my grave and kick my ass, too!"

At the lake, John stripped and waded out to where the water was chest deep. With Rodney back in camp and the water to further hide the evidence of his arousal, he slowly stroked his already half-hard cock, thinking about the glimpse he had of Rodney earlier – the broad shoulders and the pale skin was pure Rodney McKay and a good look for the scientist. John idly fisted his cock, letting the water lubricate the motion. He lay back in the water, letting it support some of his weight as he thrust into his hand. He flicked his thumb over the end and then ran his hand back down toward his body. He felt his balls draw up and he curled his shoulders in, coming hard into the lake water around him. He floated back, panting slightly. The speed of his orgasm after only a few strokes caught him by surprise but being around Rodney full time had notched up the tension. He had no idea how he was going to manage three more days of living in near quarters with Rodney. Getting out of the water, he was glad he grabbed his damp t-shirt to use as a towel again.

"Feel better?" Rodney asked as he walked back into the camp.

"Yeah." John realized it was true. Some of it was lingering afterglow from the orgasm but maybe he could do this. He sat near the fire, "I didn't know you could cook."

"Not sure you can call this cooking," Rodney scoffed. "Already prepared almost-chicken on a grill and tormack in a fire. Not rocket-science." He looked up, "Grilling prepared things is about all I can do. How about you?"

For all the time they had spent camping on missions they really hadn't had time for cooking. Either they ate MREs or ate whatever the natives supplied them with. "Well, I can do pretty decent spaghetti if you give me some tomato sauce to build on. Making the sauce from tomatoes is just too tedious but I like to futz with the sauce a bit," John told him, settling in. "And I've done some things out of boxes that weren't much more than following directions. Oh, I do know how to make a decent meatloaf. About the only good thing I got from being married was her family meatloaf recipe."

Rodney said neutrally, "You've never talked about being married." John could hear the effort to be non-judgmental but he was tired of hiding from his friends and especially from Rodney.

"I sucked at bring married, especially at that time in my life," John elaborated. He lay back on the ground and looked up at the sky above him. "I was at a point where I 'should' get married and she was... convenient. My dad liked her, about the only thing I ever did that he approved of. She got tired of my never being home and gave me an ultimatum -- her or the Air Force." John shrugged. "I picked the Air Force." The divorce papers had shown up seven months later, he signed them without reading them and the final decree caught up with him almost a year later. "Never been good at relationships. In fact, Atlantis is the longest I've ever been in one place – well, except for the Academy – since I was a kid."

Rodney poked at the almost-chicken, turning it over to cook on the other side. "You going to stay?" Rodney asked in that same horrid, neutral voice.

John thought about that for a minute. He had roots here, a history. More importantly -- people who wanted him. "Yeah," he said softly.

"Good," Rodney said firmly, looked up and smiled at him. Oh, he was so screwed. He'd do whatever it took to put that smile on Rodney's face – it lit up his face and made him look years younger.

"Dinner almost ready?" John had to ask before he could say anything stupid. "Anything I can do?"

"Grab plates and utensils," Rodney pointed. "Just about done." He turned the almost-chicken one last time and used the fork to dig the tormack out of the coals.

"What were you working on?" John asked, nodding at the computer Rodney had put aside earlier. As Rodney talked, John let the description of power usage, solar power and theories on building ZPMs wash over him. He nodded appropriately and asked a couple of not-stupid questions as needed but he mostly let Rodney talk on.

They let the fire burn low before they called it a night. As they crawled into their respective sleeping bags, Rodney asked pointedly, "You going to be okay?"

John hesitated but answered truthfully, "Don't know. It's been a while since I've gotten a full night sleep." He owed Rodney the truth. "It's been pretty bad lately."

"Okay, just so I know," Rodney replied calmly.

John felt like he had just fallen asleep when he found himself struggling after yet another nightmare. "John. Wake up," Rodney's voice commanded. "John."

"'kay," he mumbled, half awake. As Rodney started to move back to his own space, something in the horror of the dream made John give in. "Stay." He closed his eyes and tried not to project the desperation he was feeling. "Please?" The last was a whisper.

He felt Rodney shift slightly but didn't take his weight off John's chest. "John? Look at me?"

John opened his eyes and looked and, even in the dark, he could see clear blue eyes focused on him from inches away. He could see the concern and the worry there.

Rodney chuffed, "Damn, you're worse at this than I am and everyone thinks I'm bad with people." With no more warning than that, Rodney leaned in and kissed him. It was slow, almost chaste – Rodney's lips placed lightly against his. John somehow found two functional brain cells – Rodney was kissing him! – and started kissing back. The kiss went from chaste to carnal in a nanosecond, John surrendering to the elemental force that was Rodney McKay.

John was lost in the sensation of Rodney's kisses and the feel of a warm body against his. Rodney's hand wandered to his waist and the warm touch was electrifying. "Skin," he murmured against Rodney's lips.

"I knew you were as bright as you were pretty," Rodney grinned, sitting up to take off his t-shirt and shimmy out of his shorts. He unzipped their sleeping bags while he was at it.

"Not pretty," John protested. He reached out and gently touched Rodney's chest, "You're beautiful."

"We'll argue semantics in the morning," Rodney growled. "Just get out of those damned clothes."

John slowed down the motion he started, to make the anticipation last longer. He inched the t-shirt over his head and tossed it to one side of the bed. He worked the shorts down and lifted his hips to ease the shorts down his legs. He could see Rodney watching in fascination. Next thing he knew, he had an armful of naked scientist kissing him with intent.

The full skin-on-skin contact brought him so close... Rodney rolled them to their sides and he felt Rodney snake an arm between them. He wrapped his hand about John's cock and stroked. John buried his head in Rodney's shoulder and felt himself coming embarrassingly fast. Rodney rolled them again so he was on top of John and fit his cock into the crease of John's leg. John raised his hips to give Rodney some friction and it wasn't long before he felt Rodney stiffen and warmth spread between them.

"Nngh," Rodney moaned against his mouth.

John grinned. Interesting way to get Rodney to stop talking. Rodney nuzzled into his neck and John fell asleep between one thought and the next.

For the first time in too long, it was daylight when John woke. Rodney's head was on his shoulder, arm across his waist and one leg between John's. John wasn't going anywhere without disturbing Rodney, so he gave into the warmth.

"You ready to talk to me now?" Rodney asked softly.

After the previous night, John knew that Rodney would never let him get away with a simple answer anymore. If he outright refused, Rodney would respect his decision, but it would remain unfinished business between them. He dropped a kiss on the top of Rodney's head – how was it that doing that felt natural between them already? – and, encouraged by the warm embrace, John talked.

Looking back later, he never was very sure what he didn't tell Rodney that morning. John talked about misgivings and worries and insecurities and stress and fears. He talked about his marriage, Afghanistan, his family, commanding in Atlantis and flying. He said aloud any number of things he barely admitted to himself, much less said aloud to another person. It was more than he had ever talked in his entire life.

As John stuttered over some topic, Rodney would lightly rub his hand up and down John's arm, which gave John the strength, the composure, to continue. When he finally ground down to silence, there was a sense of relief to soothe the raw, exposed feeling.

John watched as Rodney propped himself up on one elbow and down looked at him with a mixture of exasperation and fondness.

"I'm not even going to try to deal with all of that. I knew there was more under that hair than you ever admitted to," Rodney leaned in for a brief, warm kiss. "On the other hand, there are a couple of things I can cure you of. First of all, in spite of all the bitching and moaning there are damned few things you can make me do that I really don't want to do. Second, you're doing your job far better than anyone else could and I'm not the only one in Atlantis who thinks that way. You probably don't want to know how many people helped with pieces of this little vacation of ours once they knew it was for you. Thirdly, we won't let you leave, unless you want to leave, and now that I have a personal stake in you, I'm going to work hard to make sure you don't have a reason to go anywhere. And heaven help anyone who tries to take you away from us."

"I....." John swallowed. "Thank you." He put a hand behind Rodney's head to bring him down for a long, messy, kiss. He felt Rodney lean in and roll both of them to their sides, chest to chest. Just the touching made John want to crawl into Rodney's skin and stay there. Rodney ran his hand down John's side, brushed against his ass, which made John jerk his hips closer. Oh... He felt his cock next to Rodney's and shimmied his hips slightly to rub them together. Rodney moved fractionally away but before John could protest, a large, warm hand encircled his cock. John moved fractionally to look and Rodney had his hand about both of them, holding them together gently, stroking up and down. Fascinated, John moved his hand to rest on top of Rodney's. As the stroke reached the top, John ran his thumb over the tip of both of them and heard as much as felt Rodney's breath hitch slightly.

John leaned back in to continue the kissing. He focused on tasting, on exploring, on learning. Rodney stilled under John's touch and John felt warmth spread between them. His amazement at Rodney's coming brought his own orgasm crashing in on him.

"Suppose we could use another swim," John offered some time later. "Should clean up." He really didn't want to move, weeks – months – of disturbed sleep left him lethargic.

"Food first," Rodney declared, leaning in for a quick kiss. "Start a fire while I get it organized." He pulled back from John's reaching hands. "Later. Now move."

John laughed, realizing he hadn't felt like this in... forever. "Slave driver," he grumbled with a grin. He grabbed some clothes and scrambled out of the tent to start the fire for breakfast. Looking at where the sun was in the sky, he changed that to brunch. Instant coffee, scrambled powdered eggs and not quite burnt toast tasted like ambrosia.

This time at the lake, John could look all he wanted at Rodney as they took their clothes off. Rodney handed him a squeeze bottle and said, "Here,make yourself useful," and turned so John could spread the sun-screen on Rodney's back. "Hey!" Rodney yelped as John reached down to spread some on Rodney's ass.

"Gotta make sure you're covered," John leered.

"Oh, please," Rodney rolled his eyes but ruined the effect by blushing. "Come on, in the water," he directed, pulling John along.

There was a sensuous feeling to this swim. John stayed within touching distance of Rodney, reaching out – almost to convince himself this was real. He couldn't get enough and Rodney seemed to understand, not moving too far.

Even in the cool water, John soon found himself getting hard again. Being around Rodney like this was such a turn on. He found himself being kissed while Rodney stroked him to full hardness, the warm hand a counterpoint to the cool water. When Rodney murmured, "Come for me," against his lips, he found himself coming yet again. When he opened his eyes, he could see a very smug grin on Rodney's face.

John's groan was as much passion as realization that Rodney could do this to him. When John reached out to touch, Rodney told him, "Wait. Let's do this lying down," and took his hand to lead him out of the water. They dried each other. "Towels," Rodney muttered as John laughed.

Rodney broke out a couple of MREs for lunch. John didn't want to really take the time but knew he now also had forever. Eating regularly was better for both of them and taking care of Rodney was something he could do.

Once they settled in the tent, John turned the tables by easing Rodney face down on the mattress and gently ordered, "Stay there. My turn." John reinforced that with a kiss and then lay on Rodney's back until the scientist started to relax. "That's it," he whispered, licking a stripe up the side of Rodney's neck, "relax."

John took a handful of the sunscreen and used it as lotion to run his hands up and down Rodney's entire body. He spread the lotion everywhere and then went back to Rodney's shoulders, to dig into the muscles there. John took his time, not forcing but coaxing the knots to release, leaning in to kiss every inch of skin. By the time John reached Rodney's feet, he could tell that Rodney was zoned out on the pleasure, nearly asleep. John carefully kissed his way back up Rodney's body until they were stretched out side by side. John lowered himself so that he was half on top of Rodney but his weight was mostly on the bed and closed his eyes.

John woke sleepily to find he was on his back again but unlike the morning where Rodney was wrapped around him, Rodney was between his legs, one hand splayed on his stomach. Rodney nuzzled his balls and with a flattened tongue, took a swipe up John's cock. Rodney grinned at him as he took the tip of John's cock into his mouth and ran his tongue around the tip several times. John's head fell back on the bed as Rodney swallowed him down, his other hand moving to gently rubbing behind his balls. John gave in to the hot, wet, sucking that was Rodney's mouth.

The fingers of Rodney's hand that was rubbing behind his balls moved further back. John automatically lifted one knee to allow better access. As Rodney brushed across his hole John groaned, "Yes, please...." Rodney stroked a finger across the opening and swirled his tongue across the head of John's cock. As John pushed upward, Rodney took in most of John's cock and sucked hard. John arched and came, the bitter fluid filling Rodney's mouth. Rodney swallowed and nursed John through the aftershocks. John lay boneless.

"Turn over," Rodney commanded, manhandling John's unresisting body. He stuffed a pillow under John's hips and reached for the sunscreen. "Okay?" Rodney murmured into John's ear. "I know we didn't talk about this but... I want to be in you..."

"Perfect," John mumbled, "go for it."

Rodney kissed his way down John's spine – John felt Rodney's lips burn a path from the back of his neck to his ass. The small bite on one ass cheek was unexpected, John shivered in reaction. Rodney's hands were warm and gentle as they caressed and soothed his body. He missed the contact when Rodney leaned back for a moment, to reach the sunscreen he assumed. One hand was on his lower back, rubbing small circles lightly enough to hypnotize, John felt the other between his cheeks, searching for his hole. One finger rubbed the hole, circling. It dipped in, briefly and John growled, "Rodney..." Or tried to growl, he suspected it came out more as a whine.

"Shhh," Rodney soothed. The finger was back, breaching the tight ring of muscle. John groaned when it withdrew but it was replaced by two, twisting and turning. John saw stars at one point as Rodney rubbed against his prostate. Rodney took his time, placing random kisses on his back, continuing to work his fingers inside John until he was thrumming with need.

The fingers withdrew and he could feel Rodney shift behind him. Warm hands on his hips moved him into position and Rodney pushed in. John tensed at the intrusion and then forced himself to relax. Rodney's hand moved to the small of his back, circling, getting him to loosen up. John took a deep breath and said, "Okay."

It felt like it took forever. Rodney moved infinitesimally, millimeter by millimeter until John could feel Rodney in him. John gasped with the realization.... Rodney had gotten under his skin, into his heart, a long time ago. This was the final step in completing that connection. "Move," John panted.

Rodney withdrew slightly and pushed back in. John rocked back to meet him and he could feel the jolt as their bodies met. Rodney put his hands on John's hips to hold him still and pulled out, shifted and pushed firmly back in. "Ohhh..." John saw stars. He heard a small, smug laugh from Rodney as he pushed in again in the same spot.

Then it was nothing but feeling and warmth. John felt himself coming again and Rodney stiffening behind him and collapsing on his back. The weight was comforting and warm and he fell asleep.

John woke slowly and stretched, the small pain felt reassuring – it let him know what they had done was real. He reached out for Rodney and not encountering the other man, woke enough to open his eyes and see that he was alone in the tent. A frisson of worry ran up his spine but as he listened he could hear noises outside the tent then steps coming toward him.

"Hey," Rodney said softly, poking his head into the twilight of the tent.

"You were gone," John said the first thing that came to mind, mentally wincing at how needy that sounded.

"Sorry," came the answer with a fond smile. "Had to piss and then figured we could use some food,"

John shifted and looked out through the open flap. He could see the fire going and something steaming in the pot. At that moment his stomach gurgled and he realized Rodney was right. As usual. "Okay, give me a minute?" John offered.

"Take your time," Rodney assured him.

All of his clean clothes were in the Jumper, John realized. He decided against pulling on dirty boxers and t-shirt and smirked when Rodney's eyes got big watching him walk naked the short distance from the tent to the Jumper. Not that they hadn't been around each other like this before, now it was different.

John put on clean clothes, figuring they would go back to the lake for another cleanup after eating. He went back into the trees to gather more wood for the fire Rodney had going, taking the axe to break up some of the larger pieces.

Breakfast was coffee and MREs this time. It made the fire faintly unnecessary, they could have made do without the coffee, but it was nice to sit next to. When they were finished eating, John gathered up the packaging and stowed it in the Jumper to take back with them.

"Some exploring?" Rodney asked. "Not that there's any reason but thought maybe we'd go off in the other direction for a bit. Make it really worth our while to take that swim later."

John shrugged, faintly surprised at Rodney's willingness to go wandering about. "Sure," he answered. "What did you have in mind?"

Rodney brought up his LSD and pointed, "There's something off this way. Almost positive that it's not Wraith, we can tell that pretty accurately now. It looks like a small settlement, about a dozen people, and that's relatively new."

"Do we want to get involved?" John asked.

"Let's see what it really is and then we can decide," Rodney said. "They aren't supposed to be building too close to the gate at this point so it'll be good to check on them."

"Couple of miles," John felt obligated to point out.

Rodney's turn to shrug. "I've done worse and it's a nice day."

John grinned. "Okay. Let's lock down the Jumper and see what we can find out."

They took their time on the hike and followed a meandering animal trail to the life signs Rodney had found on the detector. They had to scramble over a rock fall at one point, John giving Rodney a hand to get up on a higher ledge. The LSD didn't really show topography and it turned out that the life signs were up in the hills, so some climbing was necessary.

Using the LSD as a guide, they moved to a location off to one side of their objective which turned to put them slightly above the group. John found a ledge they could lay down on to make their watching less obvious.

"Looks like... a stage coach stop," John observed. There was a rough building that looked like a barracks and a larger outbuilding with an animal pen that could be a barn. A trail that could be the beginning of a road went by the buildings.

Rodney poked at the LSD he had brought. "I should check the maps I have and I'd like to take a ride over this on our way home but it does look like a way station on the way to the gate," he mused. "The city we dealt with is in the other direction, this must be started by another group."

"Should we show ourselves?" John asked.

"I don't think so," Rodney decided. "We're on vacation and let's leave well enough alone."

"Not a problem," John agreed. "Ready to go back?"

"Sure," Rodney replied, stowing the detector in the small pack he had brought.

The walk back to the Jumper was uneventful. They went back pretty much the same route, not seeing anything terribly interesting along the way. They scared a couple of small animals out of hiding but nothing larger than a raccoon.

Back at the Jumper, they carefully checked to make sure nothing had been disturbed, despite the lack of warning from Rodney's detector – no sense in not being cautious now - before they went off for their swim. John grabbed the t-shirt he had been using as a towel, Rodney grabbed his bottle of sun screen and they strolled off to the lake.

This time it was John's turn to pounce on Rodney. After spreading sunscreen over Rodney – and himself, before Rodney could voice any complaints – they waded into the water. After cleaning off some of the sweat and grime from their hike, John moved closer to Rodney.

Looking in the other direction as a distraction and hoping Rodney would look away also, John swept a leg underwater, toppling Rodney into the water.

Coming up sputtering, Rodney grinned, "Oh, you're in trouble now!" and splashed water in John's face. In the nano-second John reflexively closed his eyes, Rodney leapt and grabbed John bodily, taking them both under the water.

Wrestling a naked, wet Rodney was worth inhaling water for, John decided. Rodney used his upper body strength to hold on to John, finding ticklish places John didn't even realize he had. John put his hands anywhere he could on Rodney, only to have the other man use the water to help eel out of his hold before he could secure his grasp.

"Got you," Rodney breathed in his ear, one arm wrapped around John's chest, the other holding John's one hand. John was off balance enough that his free hand didn't let him do much besides hold on to Rodney.

"Now that you've got me, what are you going to do about it?" John teased.

"This maybe," Rodney thrust forward slightly and John could feel the hard cock against his ass.

"Maybe?" John moaned. "There better be more than a maybe in it."

"Oh, I think that can be arranged," Rodney leered. He used his leverage to spin John around in the water so they were face to face and leaned in for a kiss.

John put his hands on Rodney's hips, bringing their erections together. They both groaned into the kiss as John moved up and down slightly, rubbing them close together.

Rodney's hands fastened on John's back to hold him in place and steadied himself on the muddy bottom. They shifted and rubbed together, John's orgasm coming first. He held firmly onto Rodney's hips and Rodney came shortly thereafter.

"Mmmmm....." John mumbled against Rodney's lips, wanting to sink into the water and just relax.

"Mmmmm, yourself," Rodney agreed. "Come on, let's get to solid ground before we fall asleep here."

John kissed him again and then moved away. The water had washed away any evidence of their passion and they had stirred up the bottom with the activity. It wasn't quite cloudy enough to be unappealing and John knew it would settle quickly once they were on land.

John got out first, Rodney just behind. They used their t-shirts again as towels, John taking a swipe at Rodney's back to help him dry off. Rodney insisted on another layer of sun screen, even though it was relatively late in the day at that point.

They walked back to the Jumper in a peaceful silence.

"What do we have for dinner tonight?" John asked.

"More MREs, sorry," Rodney replied. "That was the simplest when I was prepping the Jumper.... before..." John knew he was referring to his own plans. "And, well, I didn't want to push my good luck too far by asking for too much."

John shrugged. "Not a problem," he replied. "We've gone longer with less than that. We have coffee and plenty of food. This is fine."

"Well, then, get a couple and I'll get the water going for coffee," Rodney directed.

John dug through the MREs and found meatloaf, one of Rodney's favorites. He took another for himself and brought them out of the Jumper. He handed Rodney's to him and was glad to see the smile of appreciation he got for that.

They sat side by side by the fire until dark fell. The fire had burned mostly down by that point and they made sure there was nothing more than coals before they used their latrine area and climbed into the tent.

Settling in, John reached out to wrap his arms around Rodney. Rodney snuggled closer to him and they quickly fell asleep that way.

John woke first, enjoying the warmth of Rodney's skin wrapped around his. For the first time in a very long time, he felt rested and clear headed. He knew that was due to Rodney's closeness and he'd miss it when they went back to Atlantis later today. They really should leave before mid-day local time to account for the time differences. Leaving here late morning should get them back to Atlantis early evening, about the time they left.

John found he was more than slightly confused. He wanted to go back to Atlantis, to pick up his work again and do it better than he had been lately. On the other hand, he didn't want to lose what he had found here with Rodney... sure, they could continue their relationship – he didn't think Rodney would let him stop at this point – but it wasn't going to be simple.

"Stop thinkin'" Rodney mumbled against his shoulder. "Sleep."

"Sorry," John whispered. "Just... thinking."

"Stop it," Rodney repeated. He snuggled closer to John and sighed. "Okay, now I'm awake, too."

"Sorry," John repeated. "Go back to sleep."

"Should think about packing up," Rodney mumbled.

"Yeah, I know," John sighed. "Just..."

"Stop. Now," Rodney said firmly. "Thinking is my job."

"Yes, Rodney," John said in a sing-song voice.

"John..." Rodney's voice had a faint warning in it.

Deciding they weren't getting anyplace, John tightened his arm about Rodney and rolled them so he was on top. Rodney widened his legs and John settled comfortably between them, their cocks rubbing together slightly.

"If I'm not allowed to think, neither are you," John teased, shifting his hips slightly so that Rodney gasped.

Deciding that since they both had morning breath, it wouldn't make any difference that he hadn't had time to brush his teeth, so he leaned in for a kiss, the movement rubbing their cocks together even more.

"Like this?" John murmured against Rodney's lips, shimmying purposefully.

"Mmmm...." Was all Rodney was able to get out but he ran his warm hands down John's back and they settled on his ass, holding them close together. John flexed slightly and Rodney arched against him. It was slow, deliberate. Neither of them seemed to want to rush this.

John's orgasm came from nowhere. One moment he was reveling in the feeling of Rodney's skin against his and then he felt himself coming, hard. It took his breath away for a moment and then he felt Rodney stiffen beneath him. They lay panting, John's head on Rodney's shoulder.

John nipped the skin along the juncture between shoulder and neck and Rodney shivered deliciously. "You're perfect, you know," John whispered. "Perfect for me."

Rodney blushed. He tightened his arms around John. John slid to the side to take his weight off Rodney and so they wouldn't stick together too much.

They must have dozed, the sun had moved in the sky and John's bladder was making itself known. He sighed, nuzzling into Rodney slightly and dropping a small kiss on his shoulder. John eased out of the sleeping bag and out of the tent without waking Rodney. Standing, he stretched to loosen up his muscles, wishing he could run for a bit, knowing it wasn't practical and he wasn't going to leave Rodney alone.

He took a leak and then wandered back to the Jumper to see what kind of food was left. He found plenty of MREs but there were some fruits and vegetables in a bin that he eyed thoughtfully. He went out and started their fire back up from the coals that had lasted through the night. He lay some of the smaller wood on it to get the fire started and some larger pieces that would be good for cooking over in a short while.

Going back to the Jumper, he went through the MREs to find a couple of breakfast selections that he could use to cobble together a meal. Rodney had done most of the cooking, he figured the least he could do was to organize one meal.

"Hey, I could have done that!" Rodney crawled out of the tent.

"Nah, I got it," John waved him off. "My turn."

Rodney grinned. "Okay by me. What do you need done?"

John looked around and shrugged. "Almost ready, just wash up, I guess."

"Sure," Rodney agreed. He dug out plates from their cache of supplies and put them near the fire.

John dished up the egg quasi-casserole, a combination of powdered eggs, freeze dried sausage and some of the fresh vegetables that had been in the bin. The coffee was still instant but hot.

"s' good," Rodney mumbled through a mouthful. "You can too cook."

John grinned. "Breakfast isn't hard," he protested. "But it did turn out good."

They finished eating and Rodney drank the last of the coffee over John's mock-protest. John cleaned up the garbage while Rodney was finishing up.

"One last swim?" John proposed. He looked up at the sun, "We probably need to think about getting back."

"How about we pack up the Jumper first," Rodney counter-proposed. "Then the swim will be restful and we can wash off any sweat. Although..." he considered, "hot and sweaty always looks good on you." He leered.

That made John laugh. "I'll have to remember that," he agreed.

It really didn't take that long to break up the camp they had set. John left the fire banked, figuring they could put it out as one of the last things they did.

"Anything else?" Rodney asked, looking around.

"Nothing that can't wait. Let's take that swim," John replied.

"Sure," Rodney said. He grabbed the wrinkled t-shirt he had been using as a towel and his sun screen. "Ready," he announced.

They spread sun screen on each other. "No sense getting a sun burn now," Rodney pointed out.

John didn't disagree, it gave him a legitimate excuse to keep touching Rodney, not that he really needed one.

The swim this time was really a swim and mostly in a comfortable silence. John's thoughts drifted to Atlantis and what they'd face when they got there. For as much as Rodney was blasι about what they had done, it wasn't really kosher and he knew there'd be consequences. Hopefully, Carter wouldn't be too upset with them.

"Told you to stop thinking," Rodney put in as he floated on his back.

"Just... " John started.

Rodney came to his feet and moved closer to John. "We're on vacation for a couple more hours," he said deliberately. "Enjoy it."

"Gonna be a long time before we get another," John couldn't resist replying.

Rodney shrugged. "Don't care," he said steadily. "It'll be okay."

John had to give in to that since Rodney as a force-of-nature was not to be denied. If Rodney was going to fight that battle, he knew he'd be further ahead by not getting in the way. He trusted Rodney to do what was best.

"You're thinking too much," Rodney decided. "Done here?"

"Sure," John agreed.

They got out of the water and dried off. The walk back to the Jumper was uneventful.

"Do we eat here or go back?" John asked.

"Let's eat here first," Rodney answered. "We'll miss dinner anyway and there won't be much by the time we get through medical."

"Makes sense," John agreed. No sense in being hungry if they don't have to be. He dug though for a couple more MREs that they ate around their dying fire. They didn't add any wood since they didn't need it for cooking.

"Anything else we need to do here?" John asked.

"Guess we're as ready as we're going to be," Rodney replied. "Let's go home."

They make sure the fire was completely dead, pouring water into the pit until no more steam came up. John stirred the ashes to make sure there were no live coals at the bottom of the pit. When he was confortable that there were no more live coals, he broke up the fire ring and moved the rocks to make it look slightly less obvious that someone had camped here.

Rodney had covered up their latrine area as John was finishing up with the fire pit. It was too much work to make it look like no one was ever here but they could make most of the evidence of their visit disappeared after a couple of weeks. They had been lucky to have good weather for the past few days but a couple days of rain and plant growth would help cover their tracks.

John eased into the pilot seat in the Jumper, feeling the Colonel Sheppard persona start to settle on his shoulders. It didn't weigh him down as much as it had lately, it was more of a warm winter coat than the lead weight it had grown to be.

"Ready?" he asked Rodney.

"Good to go," Rodney said. "Don't forget I'd like to check that way station before we go."

"No problem," John answered, starting up the Jumper and checking the systems. He lifted off and engaged the cloak.

John hovered well above the way station, seeing animals now in the pen and more people in the area.

"Follow the track in that direction," Rodney pointed in the direction that led away from the Gate.

The track was mostly dirt road and some places might be impassible in really wet weather. It certainly didn't have the level of engineering that the roads in the other city had. About twenty minutes of flying led them to a decent size settlement, much smaller than the main city they had been negotiating with before.

"This has grown a lot in the last year or so, since we moved the Gate, anyway," Rodney said.

"We need to send someone here," John stated. "Let's see if they're more interested in working with us than Smeadon or whomever is in charge."

"If they had the technology, I'd say Smeadon had naked pictures of his competition," Rodney quipped. "He's still in charge but rumor has it that he's barely holding on."

"And how do you know this?" John was curious. "And I would have thought the Genii would have taken him out by now."

"Friends of friends," Rodney temporized.

"McKa-a-a-y," John whined.

"Okay, Ronon has friends that travel around and pass information back," Rodney admitted.

"And why don't I know about this?" John demanded unaccountably hurt that Ronon and Rodney were gathering intel without including him.

"What would you do about it?" Rodney shot back. "What could you do about it?"

John protested, "I could protect your asses!"

"Ronon's been watching out for both of us," Rodney stated, much too calmly in John's opinion. "You've had enough on your plate and it's not like you could do anything about it, anyway."

"I just don't like it!" John all but shouted.

"I. Don't. Care!" Rodney said firmly.

John put the Jumper on hover and turned to face Rodney. "Rodney. Intel like that is... dangerous, if you're not careful."

Rodney looked him in the eye. "We need the information and, in the end, I don't care how we get it." He sighed. "And you tell Ronon to stop. See how far you get with that."

John grinned. "Okay, neither one of us is that stupid," he agreed. He sobered and added, "But I want in. No more going off on your own."

"No problem," Rodney agreed. "We've been holding off until you're ready for us."

"I've really been out of it, haven't I?" he asked ruefully.

"Well..." Rodney looked carefully at John and must have been satisfied with what he saw, "yes, you have been."

John felt himself blushing. "Okay, then. Need to see anything else?"

"No, I'm good here," Rodney replied. "Let's go home."

John turned the Jumper around and headed to the Gate.

Their return to Atlantis was almost anti-climatic. Chuck was at his station in the Gate room but it was obviously evening, there were few others about. The automated systems returned the Jumper to the Jumper bay and the ship settled into place.

John sat still for a moment, basking in the feel of Atlantis in the back of his head. It was like the city had checked him over in the few minutes they had been moving the Jumper back into the Bay since there was a thread of satisfaction and relief in the hum. I'm back and better, he thought at it carefully. There was a small spike of acknowledgement.

"Colonel Sheppard, Dr. McKay, you're to report to Medical for a checkup," Chuck's voice came over the radio.

"Roger that," John answered. He shut down the Jumper and looked around. "Since I didn't bring much, not much to take." He picked up the pack that held his clothes.

Rodney handed him a backpack. "Take this, then," he directed as he packed up another with his laptop. He stood and said, "Ready."

They walked down to the Infirmary and were greeted by Nurse Bending. "You know the routine," she said. "Colonel, you there and Dr. McKay, take the other." She pointed to two empty beds.

John looked around the infirmary and saw that it was mostly empty. "Not much going on," he said that as a statement but also as a question.

"Nice to have some down time," Nathalie reported. "Getting caught up on some organization and paperwork."

"Good to know," John said, sitting on the bed she had pointed at.

"Dr. Keller'll be here shortly," she informed John, taking his blood pressure and running a medical scanner over him. She tapped at the device and John knew the information was being transferred to his file.

"Have a good trip?" she asked casually.

"Well, I did spend four days camping in the woods with McKay," he temporized.

"You do look rested," she countered. "Didn't know Dr. McKay knew how to relax."

"He wasn't too bad at it," John had to admit. "Not Club Med but nice weather, a lake so we could go swimming and all the MREs you could want."

"You know how to live it up," she grinned at him.

John shrugged. "Got caught up on my sleep, that was a bonus," he told her.

The scanner in her hand beeped, "Okay, I'm done here, just need to get a sign off from Dr. Keller. Wait here while I check on Dr. McKay."

Deciding he might as well be comfortable, John lay back on the bed. He must have dozed off to the contented sound of the hum of the city in his head because he jerked awake as Dr. Keller came into the room talking. "... if it stays quiet we can look into some of those Ancient devices we've got put aside that we think could help in an emergency."

John didn't see who she was talking to and she was alone when she stepped around the curtain. "So, welcome back, Colonel," she greeted him. "Have a good vacation?"

Was everyone in on this but him? he wondered. "Not bad," he decided playing along was the easiest. "Restful, if nothing else."

Keller looked at him critically and then at the datapad she had. "You're looking better and your blood pressure is closer to normal than it's been in a while," she replied. "Okay, let's get some blood work and then you'll be good to go."

The nurse came back shortly and quickly took the blood. "You're all set," she told him. She turned as an afterthought, "If you want a hot shower, you can take one here."

"What? Why can't I just go back to my room for that?" John asked.

"Oh, right," she looked him in surprise. "You don't know. There was a massive failure on the water system three days ago and we've been scrambling since we've all had to move to new quarters. Dr. Zelenka says it's easier to move everyone than to get it fixed."

"Really?" John was amazed. Something that couldn't be fixed?

She shrugged, "More work to fix than it was worth, is what I understand. Not a bad deal in the end. We've found some nicer space as a result, at least I think so. I got a bigger room with a tub and a nice balcony out of it."

"Oh, sure," Rodney came around the corner. "Everyone's taken all the good rooms and we're probably left with a closet."

"Oh, no," she rushed to reassure him. "I think Dr. Zelenka had something for you."

"Great!" Rodney rolled his eyes. "A really teeny closet that has no windows, then." He tapped his communicator. "Radek! I'm home!"

John listened to the end he could hear as Rodney snarked back and forth with Zelenka.

"We're all set," Rodney turned to John after he signed off the radio. "Zelenka saved us an apartment."

"Us? An apartment?" John was stunned then realized they had an audience. "I have to live with you?" he whined.

Rodney harrumphed. "It won't kill you and it's good space," Rodney replied. "If it's awful, you can move out when there's something else opened up. Or you can move back after we clean up the water problems in the space we're using now. But that'll take at least a month and it's low on the priority list."

"I suppose," John rolled his eyes. "I've put up with you this long, I can do another few days."

"We done here?" Rodney looked at Nathalie who was looking at both of them with obvious amusement on her face.

"Go," she shooed them out. "If you already have new space you'll have hot showers there."

John followed Rodney out of the infirmary. "Want to get some dinner?" he suggested. "We should be able to catch the late dinner menu and after MREs some real food would be nice."

"You asking me on a date, Sheppard?" Rodney teased.

John stopped for a moment, then hurried to catch up with Rodney who hadn't stopped. "Maybe?"

Rodney grinned. "I'm kind of a sure thing, you know. But some wining and dining would go a long way to sealing the deal."

"Good to know," John laughed but starting thinking about some of the things he could do...

Rodney punched the destination into the transporter and they walked out. "This that other tower you were talking about?" John asked.

"Yup," Rodney was faintly smug. "Radek put us in that apartment I had dibs on."

"How safe is all this?" John asked.

"Well, we still have to be careful about anything that shows up in a closet but it's pretty empty just like the rooms we had already moved into," Rodney replied.

Rodney went to the end of the hall and opened the last door on the right. He pointed to the door opposite, "That's pretty much the same as this, so I put your name on it. If you decide that... maybe you want your own space."

"Let's take a look at what you have here, first," John wanted to erase that thread of uncertainty in Rodney's voice but knew he couldn't do that here in the hall.

They entered the apartment and John stopped just inside the door. He walked into a good-size living room space with floor to ceiling windows that looked on to the central tower.

Rodney came up behind him and slid his arms around John's waist and rested his chin on John's shoulder. "You can see the Jumper Bay traffic from here," he said. "Thought you might like that."

John leaned back into the warmth of Rodney's arms and relaxed, "Pretty sure of me, weren't you?" he teased.

"Umm... well, I had hopes," Rodney breathed into his ear.

John turned his head and lips met, kissing softly.

"Oh, think at the windows," Rodney broke for air. "You can make them one-way so no one sees in but we can see out."

John did that and the windows shimmered slightly. "This is cool."

"Come on, more to this," Rodney offered. "And I haven't been here, just from the plans and what was in the database."

There was something that John thought could be a kitchen at the far end, tucked into a corner of the open room. Opening one door led to a medium sized bedroom, the next a small bathroom. There was another medium sized bedroom on the other side of the bathroom. John saw a pile of boxes that were his belongings.

"Kids rooms, I would think," Rodney suggested.

"Your guess is as good as mine," John agreed.

The door on the other side led to a larger bedroom where someone – Radek and Lorne had the Marines do this, John figured – had moved Rodney's huge bed and belongings into.

"Oh, sure, you get the big bedroom," John pouted playfully. They moved through the room into the equally oversize bathroom. "And the good bathroom!" he whined.

Rodney turned and brought John close. "Well, now we have a decision to make," he nibbled on John's ear. "We can check out the shower or we can get some dinner."

John went almost painfully hard at the thought of a shower with Rodney, who laughed when he said, "Fuck dinner, I need to get my hands on you."

"Your shower is over... mmmpph," Rodney started to say but John stopped that by sealing their lips together.

"Well, okay, I think I can share," Rodney allowed. He didn't let go of John and they shuffled into the bathroom. Rodney pulled John's shirt up and leaned back to finish pulling the shirt over John's head. He threw the shirt into a corner of the bathroom and leaned back in to resume the kiss.

The feel of Rodney's shirt against his skin was hot somehow. John knew he wasn't going to make it to the shower if they kept this up but he toed off his boots without moving away from Rodney. He reached down and unfastened Rodney's pants and Rodney shimmied just so to make them fall to the floor.

They finally had to move apart to finish undressing. All the clothes went into one corner, they desperately needed to be laundered and smelled of smoke anyway. John thought on at the shower and the water started from multiple shower heads.

"Oh, this is even better!" Rodney enthused. "Didn't know it would do that."

Rodney grabbed soap and shampoo from a box against one wall and put them on a handy shelf. "Now, where were we?" he asked John.

John moved closer, putting his hands on Rodney's hips. He turned to bring them both into the warm water and groaned at the warmth coming down.

Rodney reached for the soap and lathered up his hands, "Turn around. Let me do this."

John turned and placed his hands against the wall to steady himself. Rodney's hands started at his shoulders and down his back. He massaged the soap into John's skin making it both sensual and efficient.

"Turn around," Rodney commanded.

John did, standing in the middle of the shower allowing the running water to rinse off the soap on his back.

Rodney started at the shoulders, working his way down John's chest, tweaking his nipples slightly which made John's already interested cock jump slightly. Rodney squatted down to work his way down John's legs and John bit back a groan at the sight of Rodney in front of him.

Dropping to one knee to stabilize himself, Rodney leaned in and licked at John's cock. He wrapped his hands around John's hips to help hold John steady and took in most of John's length. John let out a groan at the sensation that was going through him.

"Not gonna.... last," John got out and he felt Rodney apply more suction and just a hint of teeth, which had him coming.

What Rodney didn't clean up, the shower did and John wanted to collapse. Rodney stood and kissed him, the taste of his own come in Rodney's mouth made it hot. He reached down to touch Rodney and tugged firmly a couple of times to have Rodney spurting into the shower.

John wasn't quite sure how they dried themselves off enough to drop into the bed. "Dinner later," he mumbled, falling asleep.

It was still dark when he woke and he lay soaking up Rodney's warmth. The hum of the city was comforting and soft and lulled him back to sleep.

It was broad daylight when he woke again. Since they had simply fallen into bed without unpacking anything, John had no accurate idea of what time it was. But it should be early enough that he figured breakfast was still being served which made his stomach rumble.

"Mmmm...." Rodney mumbled in his sleep.

Needing the bathroom, John eased himself out of Rodney's grip. He washed up briefly and padded naked out of the bathroom. A sleepy-eyed, grinning Rodney watched him walk across the room.

"Hope they brought my clothes," John grinned. "Otherwise I may have to borrow something of yours."

"Not that I'd mind," Rodney sat up in bed. "But... Okay, it would be hot."

John laughed and proceeded to "his" room to see what was there. Lorne or one of the Marines must have packed up his things, every box was clearly labeled and the boxes were sorted by their contents – clothes in one stack, personal belongings in another. John knew if he checked the closet, his dress uniforms would be hanging neatly.

He dug out his alarm clock so he could set it up in the other bedroom.

He got out a set of clothes, knowing he'd have to go on duty after breakfast. He went back to the other bedroom to get his boots and found Rodney up and almost ready to go.

"Breakfast," John said.

"I'm going to at least get us a coffee maker," Rodney said as he tied his sneakers. "A good one."

"Thought you already had one in your room," John replied.

"That was only for emergencies," Rodney answered. "Once I get a new machine, I can use the old one to trade for something else we might want, later."

"Oh, I suppose you'll want me to help get you enough coffee," John teased.

"You'll be drinking it," Rodney shot back. "You better."

They arrived at breakfast near the tail end of the main serving. There were scattered "Welcome back!" greetings from both soldiers and scientists. They got food and took it to a table Ronon and Teyla were already sitting at.

"Welcome back," Teyla said. "You are looking... rested."

John tried hard to not blush but from Ronon's sudden grin, knew he failed. "Yeah, it was restful," he agreed. "Umm... thanks."

"We take care of each other," Teyla said softly, putting a hand gently on his shoulder.

"Got to beat up on your Marines while you were away," Ronon put in.

"Hope you didn't break them too badly," John shot back. "The paperwork alone is a pain."

"Nah, not that bad. Mostly some pride," Ronon replied. "Well, a couple of broken bones. But Jennifer took care of them."

"Jennifer, is it now?" Rodney teased.

Ronon looked faintly smug at that and shrugged.

"If you have not checked your messages, Colonel Carter is expecting you after breakfast," Teyla warned them.

"Suspected as much," John said with a small shrug. "Not a problem."

They finished up and Rodney invited Ronon and Teyla up to see their room after dinner. "We'll have to get some more furniture from someplace," Rodney said. "But we can make the living room space into something comfortable for movies and whatever."

"Being sociable?" John asked in mock horror. "You?"

"If you must know, yes," Rodney was firm. Then relented slightly, "Team."

Team. Yes, for Team he'd do anything. As they had for him.

"Let's see Carter," John said to Rodney.

They cleaned up their table and walked back to the transporter and came out just below the Gate room. They got more "Welcome back!" greetings like they had at breakfast.

John tapped on the door to Samantha Carter's office.

"Come in," she waved them in. "Close the door if you would."

Rodney closed the door and they sat in the chairs in front of the desk. Carter sat back and coolly looked at them in silence.

She learned that from O'Neill, John thought. He hadn't worked much with O'Neill but it was the same calculating look the General gave him when he had challenged John to make up his mind about going to Atlantis.

"You look rested, anyway," Carter started. "I think I should be jealous."

John shrugged. "Caught up on my sleep."

"I get it, you know," she said. "It sometimes gets old and you need to get away." She sighed. "You could have asked."

"And you would have said no," Rodney put in. "There's always a crisis and we can't be spared."

Sam grinned at them, "Well, you're probably right about that."

"Now what?" John asked.

"Don't do that again," Sam said firmly.

"Don't make it necessary," Rodney shot back.

"Can't promise that," Sam said, shaking her head. "You should know that."

"Yeah," John agreed.

"Come on," Rodney stood up. "You have to see what kind of a mess Ronon's made of your Marines and I have to see what Radek broke that everyone had to move."

"That move was one of the better 'bad luck' things we've had happen," Sam said. "It was surprisingly easy to move everyone and we got better living space out of it."

"Doesn't mean we want the old space to go to waste," Rodney pointed out. "And if something broke once, need to make sure it doesn't break again."

"Good point," Sam agreed. "Get out of here, you have work to do."

Relieved that the meeting with Carter had gone better than he had expected, John kept busy for the rest of the day. He looked over things Lorne had arranged, gate team assignments, scientist training and, most obviously, the organization of a move of essentially the entire expedition to new quarters inside of two days.

"Good job," John told Lorne. "I'm amazed you got everything squared away so quickly."

"Well, cold showers and non-functional bathrooms were a good incentive to everyone," Lorne agreed. "Everyone pitched in and Zelenka helped get the scientists to cooperate. Although it's interesting to see how much stuff everyone has accumulated even this far from Earth."

Thinking of his guitar and other things in his room, John nodded.

"And everyone pretty much moved only what they needed to get started, they're still going back and forth for non-essentials and probably will be for the next couple of weeks," Lorne elaborated. "So while everyone is physically moved, there's still lots of activity and settling in going one."

"What else is up?" John asked.

"Nothing special," Lorne replied. "Been quiet."

"Don't say that!" John protested. "Everything goes to hell whenever we say something like that!"

Lorne laughed. "Sorry, I know. But really," Lorne protested. "It has been quiet."

"Okay," John agreed. "Put in for some time off. Even if you don't go anywhere, you can hide somewhere in the city or go to the mainland." John didn't really want to share Rodney's idyll on Manara until he had to.

"Will do," Lorne promised.

"Do it soon," John said. "Before your curse kicks in."

After dinner, they all went up to John and Rodney's new apartment. Turned out Ronon and Teyla had been the ones who had packed up most of John's things for him while Zelenka had packed up Rodney's belongings.

"Left a few things in your old room," Ronon stated. "Figured you could get them when you had time."

They speculated what kind of furniture they could get to fill the living room space. John made a note to make sure they got a microwave and a couple cases of microwave popcorn for movie nights. He suspected Rodney had plans for a large screen of some sort – after his new coffee machine, of course.

After Teyla and Ronon bid them a good night, Ronon promising to be by early for their run, John moved to the bedroom. "I need a shower," John announced.

In the shower, he was faintly disappointed Rodney didn't join him. Coming out of the bathroom he found Rodney sitting up in the bed, laptop balanced on his knees.

"Hey!" John said softly.

"Just finishing up," Rodney said. "If you're done in the bathroom, I'll use it."

"You could have..." John offered.

Rodney looked up at John for a moment, closed his laptop and came close to him. Pressing a brief kiss on his lips, Rodney explained, "We're both used to living alone, I don't know about you but I haven't shared living space since I've been in college. I don't want to... crowd you."

The first answer that came to John was You'll never crowd me but he gave himself a chance to think with his brain and not his dick and knew this was too new to both of them. He kissed Rodney back, "Thank you. I... it's been too long for me, too."

"And while I really don't want you to go anywhere, you do have your own room." Rodney patiently pointed out. "Don't use it to hide but if you need some privacy... use it."

"Don't you hesitate to let me know if I become too..." John hesitated over the proper word.

Rodney silenced him with a kiss. "Don't worry, now that I've got you, not going to let you go," he murmured. "And you're not going to suffer in silence any more. I'm not going to let you."

"Won't be easy," John admitted.

"Worth it," Rodney said firmly.

With that John wound his arms around Rodney, bringing him close and just holding on. It was a wonderful and scary feeling, having someone in his life like this. But... "Worth it," he whispered.

"Now, let me go to the bathroom," Rodney grinned.

John released him and climbed into the bed. He heard the shower running and was half asleep by the time Rodney crawled back under the covers.

Rodney wrapped his arms around John and murmurred, "Sleep."

So John did.

 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Title from this quote:

"I have no will, unless it be the will never to decide. I have been so overwhelmed by the many storms that have broken over my head, that I am become passive in the hands of the Almighty, like a sparrow in the talons of an eagle. I live, because it is not ordained for me to die." – Alexandre Dumas, The Count of Monte Cristo

COMPANION ART BY DEEDO_2313:

BY VELOCITYGRASS:

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